Who is playing Who's game?
by MissMoonWillow
Summary: Amber Miles is Chris Miles cousin, she made a vow to not lose her virginity to any random boy, so naturally Tony Stonem wants to pop that cherry. But is he trying to play a game with someone better to his game, with a game of her own!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer!  
**I do not own any of the characters from skins, and have no claim to them!!!!

_**Also know this is a mature story, for the use of drugs swearing, and strong sexual context **_

**Chapter 1**

It was a weird sort of January morning, considering it was the first of the month, and the taste of last nights drink, plus Spliff remained in my mouth. I knew this was going to be a long day. I didn't want to open my eyes, or see the person who was casually lying on my back. Where the hell am I, I slowly open one eyes first, and then stretched a hand to touch the body. I tell right away it's a male's body, and then I could feel the clothes, then chin, finally glasses. I sigh with relief; I feel asleep with Sid, nothing happened.

I pushed myself from under him, and finally come across my shoes; I pick up the six inch wedge heels, and scan this messy room with a grunt. The chocolate and cream leather sofas with ash and spilt drinks on, the walk paper of soft caramel was covered in salsa and frosting. I knew that it was going to be hard to get out without ruining the paper.

I can see Jal, her head under the table. Michelle with her wild hair, she was curled up on an arm chair, and Anmar on the floor in just his boxer. I move from the living room, into the kitchen area. I can tell the starting place of the food fight, and there is Cassie sitting at the table with a glass of water, and I wave to her.

"Hay Cass." my hands still red, and I see its cake icing, and my purple and pink polka dot halter dress is never going to be clean again.

"Hi Amber." Cassie smiled fiddling the glass in her hand, out of everyone she seemed to keep clean, I didn't like the fact I had cake in my hair, and some kind of odd dip on my neck. "Like, wow it's really the New Year, and it's going to be great." she smiled more dreamily, and I nod. "Yeah, Cassie, a great year." now sitting with her looking around the room. I didn't want to start cleaning this mess, the kitchen wasn't big, the cabinets dark green, with white tiles, marble surface, and everything posh. The kitchen looked like a bomb site, what the hell, was I thinking. The booze bottles empty, ashtrays full, and the smell lingered. I felt my stomach squirm.

"You got cake in your hair, I took a shower, then come back." Cassie, she had a way of talking where she, well she never seemed to be with you, like she was an observer looking in.

"I know Cassie." I reply, I slowly get back to my feet, and it feels like slow motion. The drink was wearing out my system, and it hits me, I have to clean my flat before Gina gets home from Spain. Gina being my over worked mother, who unlike Michelle's, enjoyed her single life, and wasn't engaged to an arsehole.

I walk down the hallway, the cake splattered on the wall the neatly done black and white design, the photos that mum spent over a thousand pounds, glamour shots of me and her on the walls, but most of the glass frames drawn on, and I avoid looking.

I push open the main bathroom, and see a head sticking in the toilet. "Get out!" I snap, and the boy open his eyes quickly leaving the bathroom, my head is feels too heavy for my body, and I walk down the hall, my luck is only little. No one went into her room, so now I move to find my bedroom, and the door was ajar. I push it slowly, then snap it open seeing Tony, Maxxie and Chris all asleep on my bed.

Throwing my shoes on my beanbags, I didn't want to bother them, and I smiled picking up my digital camera snapping the moment forever. "Oh this can come into handy some day soon…" I giggle and think of myspace. Oh they will hate me.

My room is panted a dark orange, with purple borders, it's the other room unaffected by the food fight, my laptop closed, and my ipod on charge on my work desk too neat to function, my vanity table organize with my make up kits, I always made sure everything in my room was in it rightful place, and I look over my book cupboard.

The room was a mixed of Goth punk, and princess, my wardrobe on the wall takes up most of the room, and my queen size bed with a canopy dead centre.

I figure this picture would end up on my wall of shame, purposely dominating one whole wall of my room, the others with posters and my own paintings and photography; I look at the photos I got so far smiling at my closest friends faces on the wall, sometimes I wondered what it would be like without them.

The carpet makes it easier for me to sneak to my wardrobe and open it lightly to not wake up the boys, and I find my favourite pair of Miss sixty Jeans, and a purple vest top, I was going to shower, dress, and get my flat in some order before tonight.

I get into the fast warm running water; the bathroom was my favourite place that I had to share. The shower pretty much never lost heat, the full length mirror, and pretty much cream red; in a whole I loved my flat, no stairs, and no fuss.

I scrub the dip off myself, and look at my arms, my skin is a pale colour like soft peach with a tiny of white, I laugh getting all the cake out my hair, and I get the feeling it wasn't going to be fun for the others, and I turned the shower off stepping out feeling my hand around for a towel, I swiftly take one fluffy white one, and wrap it around myself. Moving to the mirror I quickly smear a patch to catch my reflection. I smile seeing the makeup washed from my bright blue eyes, my heart shaped face framed by a feathered bangs, and long blonde hair I have the undertone of my hair a deep crimson red. Wasn't to hard quickly drying off, and then putting my clothes on.

Jal was awake when I got to the kitchen again; she had started to clean the kitchen. It didn't seem that bad anymore and I smiled looking to the dishwasher full of glasses.

Jal's hair was pulled back into a rough ponytail, she had worn jeans and a nice top, but it was ruined with cake, and salsa dip. She was one of the friends I had that was too responsible, but right now I loved it. "I thought I'd start the clean up, don't want your mum killing you." she smiled cleaning the work surface and I nod, it wasn't hard to be happy. "Good party last night." Jal added when I went over to the kettle, it looked safe to use so I fill it up with water looking to the table.

"Did Cassie leave?" I asked feeling lost in my own home, and Jal stared in my direction.

"Na, she's with Michelle in the living room cleaning." with a gentle smile, and looking to the kettle. "You don't mind making me a tea?" she smiled pointing to the kettle I was filling. "Like I would make a tea only for me." my face brighter, I had put my long wet hair into plaits, and now getting two mugs out, I knew that Cassie would never drink tea.

Opening the fridge was refreshing, my stomach was finally starting to kick me with it punishment for drinking too much, and picking up the milk took more effort than it should necessarily take. Hands now slid around my waist, I didn't know who it was holding me before I hear the voice. "Hello, care to make another cuppa for me, cousin!"

I spun around facing Chris, the only thing we had in common was the surname, his father is well, my uncle, and my mother never married, so I was stuck being a Miles.

"How about, you help clean this flat, and I don't give you a fat lip!" I reply, and I know how to make my voice sound serious, when I don't mean shit.

He backs off giving me his puppy eyes, the grey blue make me raise an eyebrow.

"Come on Amber, you had a good time…" he smiled cheeky, and I throw a dish cloth at him, as Chris normally caught it quickly. "Fine, I'll make you a tea, just go help!" I point to the door; he quickly kisses me on the cheek. "You're too good to me."

I watch him rush away, and finally listen to the hot water boil. I take more mugs out the cupboard, and now finding the sugar putting in a bowl. I didn't know what to expect when I went into the living room.

The living didn't look like the nightmare I left it this morning, in fact it look a mild bad dream. I am holding a tray with mugs of tea for all, and Chris snatches the Drama queen mug, my eyes find Tony who stood by the widow shifting icing, and his dark hair seemed perfect and smart dressed. Michelle stood by his side, and I ignore the feeling I got, I mean they wasn't together, or so they tell people.

"Oh Amber, this is lovely!" Sid grabbed his mug, piling tones of sugar into it, and I finally find a clean place to sit. I once again find out that I under counted the teas, so I would need to make me one later.

"It's no problem Sid." my voice dropped, I didn't want to move now, the living room cleaned, and then hall, all done. "Oh, sorry about falling asleep on you." Sid added making me cringe, "Sid, its ok…"

Maxxie entered the room sitting on the arm of the chair I was sitting on, and I laughed with him at a still passed out Anmar.

"No one wake him!" I whispered, and I now slip my camera out my pocket. The snap, flash makes Anmar jump out his deep sleep.

"Oh, OH, oh Am, what you do that for?" he snapped, and then looked to the fact he was only in boxers, and that I had another Anmar picture for my wall of shame.

The room laugh watching him jumping to his feet, and turn to Cassie holding his clothes. "You wanted to prove you had the body of a god…" she smiled, and Anmar snatched his clothes back.

"Well his no that bad…" my voice cooed after Anmar, Maxxie lightly slapping my arm and my eyes shoot to his. I loved how Maxxie has bleached his hair blonde, making his blue eyes highlighted.

"You know, you are a good tease." his laughs, while I now place an innocent hand to my face. "I told him… I'm saving myself…" my voice sweet.

It was the one thing I found guys, believed and wanted to break, or didn't believe and prove me wrong. I didn't' make a big deal out of it, but my friends knew I wanted my first time to be, one special, and two, with a relationship over a six month period.

"Well Amber, you ever going to have a picture of you on that wall of yours?" Tony now asked me, he stood by the side of my chair, his eyes bright, and the mystery they held deep inside himself.

"Well Tony, I'm just too careful, plus I delete all incriminating photos of me." I poke my tongue out to Tony. He lightly pinches my cheek, and I laugh again. "I will get a really embarrassing photo of you one day Amber." His voice smooth, half my time with Tony is controlling to deep erg to kiss him, but then I wasn't the girl to want Tony. I mean a part of me does want him, but then I know the games Tony plays, so I keep my safe distance.

"Well Amber, I think you set yourself up too high." Chris putting the empty mug down on the coffee table, his eyes scanned mine for a moment, and I just shrug. "Well then Christopher, maybe I do, but then I have to keep up appearances." I used my hands to push me off the chair, "Plus if this flat isn't perfect, I'm not going to worry about my wall of shame." My voice soft, and I start to wonder if this flat would be clean enough when Gina got back.

Looking out the window I can see the perfect night sky, the flat was cleaned at last. Jal, Michelle, Sid, Cassie and Anwar had left, so it was just me, Chris, Tony and Maxxie left.

"Finally, the place looks like we found it." Chris smiled relaxing on the sofa, Tony sitting next to him, and then watched me at the Window.

"Looks like you get to see another day Amber." He spoke to me, and I turn around to face him.

"Looks so, thank you guys," I now find the arm chair sitting down relaxing out. "I doubt she will ever know." I close my eyes hearing the front door open, then close.

"Amber, are you here?" Gina's voice was loud through the hall, and Chris broke into a smile.

"Yeah, we're having a gang bang in here!" My eyes shot a glare at him.

"Well make sure you're wearing a rubber!" She laughed her reply looking into the living room, and her eyes scanning the room. "At least my flat is in one piece." Her sigh of relief, and I shrugged.

"Well mum, have a good trip?" my voice calm and Maxxie moved off the arm of the chair, and sat on the sofa with Chris and Tony.

"It was a fucking nightmare, first they tried to fly me coach! Then they mixed up my hotel reservation, and finally the cunt of a hotel manger tried to bribe me with a stupid cheap wine."

I stared blank at her, in the end my mother was a lawyer, so nothing made her happy.

"So, are you happy to be home?" Chris asked reaching over picking up a can of coke drinking it quickly.

"The fucking Gatwick was packed, and they lost my luggage, and when they found it, fucking wanker Cab driver went and tries and over charge me!"

Chris nodded with his fake sympathy. "Well, you know this country…."

Gina laughed, "Well I am going to bed, Amber I'm happy you listened to me, and not hold a party." She tapped the door frame leaving us alone.

"Close right." Maxxie smiled, but was cut off by a loud scream.

"Amber Haley Miles!" her voice was a loud boom, and I jump to my feet running to her room.

My eyes go from my mum's angry face, and then to her open bed sheets to the piles of used condoms, and left over wrappers.

"I am going to ground you so long, your great grandchildren will have no social life!"

My face creasing up, "But mum, if I'm grounded, how will a get pregnant?"

I held the door frame, and then turned to see the others leaving the flat.

Tony quickly holding my arms, "Well Ber, see you when you're free…" he quickly kissed my cheek before, rushing out to leave me with my very pissed off mother.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Being grounded wasn't that annoying, one the fact that Gina worked too much for her own good. After telling her the effort I went into her not finding out, she saw that as punishment enough.

It was now the fifth of January; it's the first day back at college after winter break. I opened my eyes to the buzzing of my alarm clock and I roll on my side smashing my fist on the off button. I didn't want to get out of bed; it was one of them mornings where me and mum both forgot to turn the heating on. So naturally my room was freezing cold, and my quilts kept me warm.

Eventually I push the covers off me, the cold wasn't that bad but I grab for my bathrobe lying next to my bed. I always slept in nighties and I found it was easier to pull them on and then off into the morning.

I quickly showered and found a cute back to college outfit. I picked my purple skinny jeans, a white long t-shirt with a picture of a red apple. My hair was straightened to perfection with a purple Alice band, as always make up is simple but powerful.

"AMBER! Breakfast is ready." Gina called me from my room, I disconnected my iPod from my laptop ready to use.

I finally slip my converses on, tied the laces up and I picked my watch on my vanity table placing it on my left wrist.

"Coming mum!" I called picking up my college bag and then finally my jacket heading for the kitchen.

Getting into the kitchen I always establish breakfast ready as, the bottle of milk was beside the cereal and bowl.

"Is that what you're wearing to college?" Gina asked me after pouring some milk into her coffee mug, I glanced to her. She was wearing a chennel suit with Jimmy choos. I sometimes wonder why out of all the mums I got the model slash lawyer.

I quickly look over my outfit and then felt lost. "Mum, I'm going Roundview College, not the Ritz…" I then picked the cereal and poured it into the bowl. The noise was the only thing heard in the room. After putting the milk with my cereal is when Gina started to make that clucking noise with her tongue.

"What!" I snapped placing my spoon next to the bowl as she kept her eyes on me.

"I'm just thinking you're not going to get much of a boyfriend looking like that."

I stifled a laugh before straighten myself up in my chair. "Come off it mum, I mean for Christ sack, you don't even have a proper male role model for me!" I now start eating the cereal, I always got into these conversations with her and it always ended the same.

"Well what about that blonde," She started taking a sip of her coffee and then gave me an encouraging smile. "Maxxie, that's his name right?" She asked with another smile.

"Mum, Maxxie's gay!" I then looked down into my cereal realise how quick I ate.

"And how long has that been?" she gave me a questioning look and I rolled my eyes, and then picked up my school bag.

"Since your last birthday party, he copped off with the caterer." I then looked to my watch, "Plus I have to go…" I now picked my bowl off heading to the sink.

"Oh speaking of Gay, you have to spend the weekend at your father's." she smiled waving.

"Do I really have to, I'm sixteen years old!" I snapped rinsing the bowl quickly. "Yes and until your 18, He's got legal rights!"

I grunted leaving the kitchen, picking my keys from the table in the hallway. It wasn't that Gina and Scott hated each other, more of the, they was best friends, he is in fact gay and extremely proud. So Gina and Scott were in a state of good times, thought it would be funny to have sex and here I am.

I got to the exit of the flat, and the normal jingle caught my attention as I reach for my mobile phone, I looked to the caller ID before flipping the phone open.

"Hello Michelle." I said simply and looked around the near empty car park, took a deep intake of breath and felt the cold chill hit me.

"Amber, I want to know, did you see Tony this weekend?" her voice was shaking, I tried to not speak so harsh, but I wasn't prepared to lie on Tony's behalf.

"Sorry Michelle, me and Maxxie had monster movie mayhem night in." I felt bad digging Tony into trouble, but I wasn't going to be his excuse.

Michelle didn't speak for a while, I couldn't help but feel bad and "Wait are you talking about yesterday?" I spoke softly and Michelle's voice squeaked a yes, I gritted my teeth. "Oh, yeah he came round yesterday, to borrow something." I now felt a sinking guilt, but Tony owed me one now.

Michelle sighed and hung up without saying goodbye, I carried on walking to the bus stop seeing Maxxie waiting for me. He was wearing flared jeans with white and pink horizontal stripes shirt. I stood next to him glancing to his face and then gave a small smile.

"So Amber, looking good…" He placed his arm around my shoulder; I watched his face looking at me.

"You know my mum thought we would make a cute couple." I said quietly, Maxxie gave a double take watching me, then looking out for the bus. "She what?" he now started to turn pink and I lightly elbow him in the stomach.

"Maxxie, I think she understands, you, well she was set straight." I now put my hand out for the on coming bus that we needed to get on and Maxxie relaxed as we found seats. Maxxie then gave off his hundred dollar smile. "You know Amber, we would make a great couple." His hand squeezing my shoulder comforting me and I laughed. "What we fancy the same male celebs, have a same taste in shoes." I then laughed looking out the window as the streets past us.

"Something on them lines…" Maxxie answered then looked at a boy at the next stop, and I looked to with a head tilt. "Oh baby!" Me and Maxxie chimed at the same time, and then laughed as the bus drove on leaving the good looking guy behind.

Getting to Roundview collage, Maxxie and I kept close together. I kept a keen eye out for Tony; he had a lot of explaining to do. I wasn't about to let him get away with using me as an alibi.

"Amber!" A cheery voice called my name; I snapped my head around to see Chris rushing towards me and Maxxie. "Hey, I wanted to tell you." He pursed catching his breath, Chris smiled looking up at me through his long lashes and took a out a cigarette out lighting it. "Tony's looking for you." He added quickly and I rolled my eyes, I knew why he was looking for me.

"I can guess…" I muttered trying to sound less pissed off than I was, it wasn't working seeing Maxxie and Chris's faces.

"What got into you?" Chris asked, his eyes focused on mine before I pushed him playfully. I didn't say anything seeing Michelle and Jal coming towards us.

"Amber." Jal called, they had stopped a few metres away from us, but then were obviously calling me away from my comfort zone.

"Amber, can you come over here?" Michelle asked softly and Maxxie pushed me towards them, I had enough time to give him a glare before walking to my fate.

"Yes Michelle?" I finally said standing in front of them both; Jal kept giving me questioning looks.

"I want to know, have you and tony been…" she pursed looking to Jal; she couldn't even finish her own question.

"Have you and Tony been seeing each other?" Jal finished the question; I couldn't help but laugh holding my stomach. "Well have you?" Michelle snapped getting my attention.

"No!" I replied feeling my lungs burn from laughing. "I am the one girl on this planet that can see right through him." I then brushed my hair from my face watching Michelle and Jal. "If you were smart Michelle, I'd end it." I then turned to Jal, "you know I'm talking the truth."

Jal took a deep breath nodded, "Well you don't fancy him them?" She asked me lightly, but my eyes narrowed watching Michelle more than Jal.

"No." I said simply turning to walk away; I could see Tony joining Michelle and Jal as I rejoined Maxxie and Chris.

"Tony, it's over!" Michelle shouted, I quickly turned around to see the scene. Jal had taken this time to join us, I rolled my eyes.

"Michelle it meant nothing." Tony said in his own defence, but Michelle's eyes could kill.

"Leave me alone tony, I never want to see you again!" she screamed pushing him hard, I watch her leave him alone. I couldn't help but glare as he smile.

The notorious Tony Stonem was single again, girls of Roundview beware. Little did I know that girl was me.

* * *

Author's note: I am hoping to spend more time writing this story, I know this chapter took me a while to complete, but I am trying to focus on my Editing skills. I am sorry if I have kept you waiting, but hoping that all will change.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN:** Hola, so I have neglected this story, I have been having some issues with writing, I mean in the long run I know my grammar isn't perfect, but I have been knocked, so yes, for those who have been waiting for more, I really am sorry, so sorry.  
So I'll promise to try and keep this updated.  
Mucho Amor  
Emy  


* * *

**Chapter 3**

Sitting in History, I started to take out my notebook, pens. I glanced to my left to see that Tony had sat with me. "Why hello, Amber." He smiled with a hint of charm, He then moved his chair, and he glanced to my work.

"Tony, you don't even take this class…" I exhaled while putting my pen down looking to him, "So what do you want?" my eyes going back to the notes I'd taken for my course work, I didn't look back to him.

"I was wondering," Tony spoke softly, I knew he was whispering close to my ear, but I kept looking to my notes, even ignoring him, well it was easy enough to do.

"Well, keep wondering." I now glanced to him, his face an inch or so from mine, "Tony, just say it." My eyes going back to my work, I could see the teacher was going to be late.

Tony moved closer, normally girls would swoon; I just kept unblinking at him. "Well, while I'm still young." I added while glancing to Jal watching us from another table.

He laughed, "Tonight, party." He said while moving his hand close to my shoulder, "I want you to come."

"Well, I don't want to, and you're not getting anything from me!" I snapped while playing with my pen, I kept my eyes looking to my notes, not even reading them. "I'm not joking." I added before moving my chair away from his.

"Ok, I'll see you later." He got up before brushing a hand down my back, I couldn't bring myself to look at him, I did even want to.

I listened to the door open, and then closed before glancing back to see Michelle sitting with Jal, they were both staring at me. "Just lovely…" I muttered as Sid sat beside me.

"So, you're going to the party tonight?" he asked while glancing to my notes, "did I miss anything?" he asked while glancing from me to Jal and Michelle.

"Nothing, you've got any of your course work done?" I asked while avoiding the first questions, I didn't really know what else to think. "Why?" adding quickly I glanced to the door again.

"Well Amber, Tony wanted me to ask, you know about the party…?" he spoke nervously; I could feel him looking back to the door with me. "I mean, I wouldn't normally push it, but then," Sid kept rambling on.

"Sid, you're being an idiot, and I'm not going tonight, I have other plans." I said while trying to keep my eyes from looking over to Michelle.

"Yeah, well it's not just him; it's going to be me, Anwar, Maxxie and even Chris…" he spoke carefully as the Teacher come into the class.

"Sid, you're rambling, and I like to pay attention," I said while looking to the front of the class, and I felt him watching me. "Look, I'm not going, I have better things to do with my time!" I snapped out of the side of my mouth.

"Is there anything I can help with you two? Since your conversation is more important than my lecture." Mr Barkley glanced from Sid, back to me.

"Nothing Sir, just Sid was asking me to tutor him…" I smiled sweetly, but then side glanced to Sid, "Isn't that right?"

"Yeah, sure, right…" Sid now swallowed hard, and then nodded, "Yeah, what she said." He added while glancing to me.

I now nodded, "so, you were saying about the French revolution?" I now place my pen on the side of my lip, "It's got to be completely fascinating…" I wink lightly, and Mr Barkley swallowed.

"So, we were talking about Louis-Auguste, and his marriage to Marie Antonia Josepha Johanna von Habsburg-Lothringen." Mr Barkley started to carry on; I now started to glance to my notes again.

"What do I tell tony?" Sid whispered, his voice kept low as I kept writing down, "I mean, cos he needs to know."

"Tell Tony, I'm busy, if he asks what I'm doing, tell him." I stopped, and glanced to the board, Mr Barkley writing down dates, "Tell him I'm doing work…." I glanced to him with a smile.

"Tonight, Cousin," Chris grabbed my shoulder to turn me around. I was walking to the green after English lit, "Party!" he added while I felt him holding me still.

I shrugged him off before walking forward, "No…" I kept walking, but then turned to see Chris looking to me, he had puppy eyes. "No." I repeated.

"Come on, Amber…" he kept watching me, slowly he walked placing his hand on my shoulder. "It's going to be a wicked night, and also I'll get you all the spliff you want." He started to grin at me.

I turned on my heels to carry on walking, "don't need it Chris…" I now sung while finding Maxxie. "Hey sweets," I threw my bad next to Maxxie's before hugging him.

"So, big party tonight," Maxxie smiled.

"Oh, not you too," rolling my eyes I let go of Maxxie, and he gave me a funny look, "First Tony, then Sid, Chris and now you." I pulled my long hair into a ponytail out of my face, "I can't catch a break." I sighed taking a joint off of Anwar.

"Amber, you have to come, I mean it won't be the same without you there." Anwar watching me carefully, I didn't know what to say, just took in the smoke, and held it before letting it go.

Passing the joint to Chris while relaxing in the damp grass, "You guys will be ok without me, I have work to catch up on." I closed my eyes, and Maxxie hugged onto me lightly.

"Yeah, but it'll be fun, plus it's the start of term, not much course work…" I opened my eyes to see Chris exhaled smoke, he was watching me. "Ok, here is the deal, you come tonight, and I will help you will any course work." He grinned.

I moved away from Maxxie, "Chris, the only help you can give me with any of my work, is to stay away from me, when I do it…" I now took the joint from him again taking a long drag.

"Oh come on Amber!" Chris glanced to Maxxie, "Please…" his voice going sweet.

"Fine!" I waved my arms quickly, "fine I'll go." I glanced back to Maxxie, "but only for enough time to show my face."

Maxxie smiled, "Amber, if it makes you feel any better, I'll make sure no one tries it on." He hugged me.

"Ok, other terms of me coming, you come over and help me pick out the right outfit?" my hand lightly placing the joint to Maxxie's lips.

Taking it off my Maxxie gave me a grin, "Girl I know what you can wear, I'll help do your hair as well…" Maxxie was getting his pre party grove, most the time I would hang with Maxxie as we had so much in common. Shopped at the same stores, liked the same music, and even fancied the same boys.

"Lovely, well I think I am all set." My eyes glanced across the green to see Tony about to join us, maybe I could be a complete heartless bitch, but it was Tony, even if I knew he wanted to be in my knickers.

Sitting with us, Tony took the joint from Maxxie taking a long drag, "So, who is ready for tonight?" most of his attention was on me, he inhaled with the sophistication he tried to portray.

Maxxie kept staring from Tony to me, was we having a staring contest as my eyes wouldn't look away from his, "Yea, Ber is coming after all Tony." Maxxie lightly said.

Not helping but glare, not that I wanted to look mean to Maxxie, but a part of me felt duped. "Well not going to stay all night, also I've got an early morning, college and all." I now pulled my bag towards me, a part of me wanted to stay, but seeing Jal walking closer, I knew I just didn't want to get into any drama. "Call me before you come over, ok Maxxie." I leaned down kissing him lightly, it was a thing Maxxie and I did.

Feeling the full blast of Jal's face, I felt her hand catch on mine as I walked away from the group, "you know Tony wants you?" Her voice didn't pick the tone I'd expected, but I felt frozen to the spot.

"What is that meant to mean?" I asked while trying to keep up a guard, in the long run Jal was more of Michelle's friend than mine, plus the whole I was more one of the boys.

Jal's eyes softened, I couldn't help but drop my guard a second, "Look, it's no secret most guys, well they know your still a virgin."

"Yeah, and what is the problem with that?" I snapped quickly my guard back again.

"Look, I'm just saying, Tony has it in his head he's the be all, so just don't let him fool you." Her voice soft again, I didn't know if I should be insulted or flattered by this? "Ber, I am your friend as well."

"I never really thought that, but trust me, I am not getting any closer to Tony that I already am." Saying that I walked away, even if I was tempted to glance behind me to see the group, I just simply had other things to do.

Playing with my peas, I didn't really feel that hungry, but rule one in this house was everyone ate dinner. I kept my eyes on my plate, but I knew it was asking for trouble. "So what trouble happened today?" her voice rang over my silence.

"Nothing…" I replied, my eyes drifted back to the peas rolling around the plate, I knew Gina wouldn't drop it; maybe it was just my luck to get the parent that cared.

"You know what our counselling said, we need to talk more open." There Gina was bring that up, but I'd given up pushing veg on my plate, my eyes focused with her for a second.

"Just Tony and Michelle broke up again today, so Tony is making it clear he wants to have me." I placed my knife and fork down, my eyes kept glassy, but I knew she'd never really get it.

Gina blinked for a few minutes, "but I thought you liked Tony?" she asked as both our phones went off at the same time, Gina picking hers up first. "What!" she snapped.

I used this time to pick my phone up, Maxxie sent a text telling me he was on his way over. Picking up my plate I took this chance to throw my half eaten dinner into the waste-recycling bin, before rushing off into my bedroom.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

I sat in my bedroom after having a nice warm bath, I knew it would have been easier to have a shower, but sick and tired of constant streams of texts. Mostly from Tony, I didn't reply, I wasn't going to fall into giving him impression he was getting anything from me.

Sitting at my vanity table I started to pull my long hair out of the towel, it fell in a lump around my shoulders. Taking a brush I started to pull it through the matted mane of my hair.

Halfway through styling the door knocked, I simply turned my face away from the mirror, my hands covered in moose, "Come in!" I called before turning back to the mirror.

"Well, looks like someone is going to be on the pull." Maxxie's cheery voice filled my room; I smirked to myself while back combing my hair.

I stopped mid comb, my face slowly turning to face Maxxie sitting on my bed watching me, "Please, make me laugh." My eyebrow raised as I turned to look at my reflection, "I'm never on the pull, boys are so immature sometimes…"

"Nice, Amber, I so happen to be one of them boys," his voice put that tone; it was the tone I'd grown to get used to. He wasn't upset.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes, "Maxxie, you get an instant laps to that rule, for being so cute, and my very gay best friend," I turned again to look at his face, his smile was always something to make anyone instantly happier. "So," I poked my tongue out with a simple giggle.

"You know we're going to be late at the speed you're going at," Maxxie kept watching me as I carried on the finer details of my hairstyle for the night, part of the fact my hair seemed to be everything. I wanted it to look just right.

Picking up a tube of my favourite frosted lipgloss I puckered up my lips turning for the last time to face Maxxie, "Perfection my dear, it takes time, and I like being just right." I glanced to see I was still in my bath towel, "clothes will also help." I added.

"AMBER!" Maxxie jumped up, "What are you like girl," he walked over to my outfit already in my closet, he took it out passing it over to me, "I'll be talking to your mum while you change, I'd like to get there before all the fit boys are taken," he added slamming the door behind him. I laughed before heading to my underwear draw.

"Ta da!" I waved my hands, I was wearing a black vest top with a red stones making a rose, it went well with my black mini skirt, my knee length boots had a six inch heel, I knew before I know it I would regret the heels, but for now I felt I looked smoking hot. "Good things take time." I finished with a spin.

Maxxie rolled his eyes at me, even Gina coughed, "Yes, but you're an hour late," she glanced to Maxxie, "so you two better hurry before all the fit boys are taken," she smiled as Maxxie got to his feet.

"Well Miss Miles, I know I can work something out," he winked, and I now rolled my eyes grabbing his arm, "I'll be good, and if I can't get home, I'm crashing at Maxxie's." I pulled him to the hall taking my keys, "I hope this is worth it," I whispered knowing that I was going to be spending the night watching everyone else getting off their face.

"Chris!" my voice screamed, but I knew my cousin was going to be ok, he'd always have a way of keeping himself out of trouble, he got off his back after failing a summersault over the kitchen table, he got up shaking it off like always. "Don't do that," I added handing him back his spliff, I'd taken a good pull before feeling him rest a hand onto my shoulder.

"Ber, you really need to chill," his voice smooth, even after five largers, three vodka jelly shots, God knows how many pills and spliff, he never seemed to talk drunk, but that was just Chris. "I want you to enjoy yourself cuz," he passed a pill to me, I could see it was an E, but part of me couldn't be the one to be out of the scene, "It's good, I won't let you be having shit," he said into my ear a little louder than intended.

"I trust you Chris," I placed it on my tongue chancing it with my JD and coke, more Jack than cola, I knew that I'd spend a good part of the party in the kitchen with Chris and Anwar, well Anwar had left a while trying to get laid. Part of me would of helped, but letting him do what he wants.

I kept my eye on the door, when I got here, Michelle was giving me the evil eye, Jal following suit it made me think what I could of possibly done to get on their bad side. Maybe it was the rumours that some how, I was after Tony. As if, I wasn't going to change any ones mindset, I was giggling as I looked over to Chris, he was holding me close. "You know, us Miles have to stick together," he bragged, part of me felt closest to Chris out of my whole family, maybe it was bounding over the death of Peter it was a hard time on the whole family. "I love you!" he shouted.

I knew it was how he'd get when we were drinking together, getting high, I laughed, "I love you too, you silly prat!" I could see him now making his way into the kitchen, finally.

"TONY!" voices all at once made my high sink, I kept my eyes neutral, easier to let him know that out of all the girls here, I wasn't going to be that girl, "Hey Mate, I was wondering when you was going to show," Chris passed the spliff over, his arm still wrapped around my shoulder, part of me was happy that he was here, even if he'd let Tony get his way.

Tony kept glancing from Chris to me, it was easy to tell what he was staring at, "Yeah, I was waiting on Sid, typically," he added, he winked at me, but all I could do was shrug. "So you got anything?" he asked, part of the reason everyone came to Chris, he was the one who always had something.

"I am the man," Chris passed the same pill he'd given me, and Tony was quick to place it on his tongue, reaching over he took my drink knocking the last of it back. "Mate, you didn't just still my cousin's drink?" he asked, but in his tone I knew he was trying to make fake drama.

"It's alright Chris, I can get myself another," I tried to ignore the fact Tony was still holding onto my glass, "Tony," I took my glass, my eyes focused on his for a moment, "Michelle is in the living room," I added slipping passed them to move to where in the living room the bar was.

Tony kept behind me; I could feel his heavy steps, "Have I done something to piss you off?" he asked as I kept looking forward, I got to the bar finding the bottle of Jack Daniels, I reach opening it seeing now many have touched it, I could see Michelle, her eyes, like always an evil glare.

"No, and yes," I started while trying to get my drink right for me taste, "for some reason your girlfriend,"

"Ex girlfriend," Tony corrected me, I could see Michelle moving away from my vision, and I couldn't believe this.

"Well, what ever she is at the moment, has the impression I'm after you," I turned to face Tony now, my eyes focused on his, "So right now, I want to know why you break up?" I knew it was hard to get a straight answer out of Tony Stonem, but it was all I could do to try and keep my friendship with him. "And don't try and lie to me Tony," I added looking to my drink feeling myself ignore everything around Tony and me.

Tony picked up a can, larger opening it, "Why can't I just break up with someone, and it not be a public sceptical," he took a sip, he shrugged off the question, I raised my eyebrow trying work him out. "I need a break Ber, for all the people I thought you'd understand."

"Sorry Tony, but the fact you're doing your flirt act with me," I stated placing a hand on my hip watching him closely.

Tony laughed, "Flirt act," he glanced away from me, "Amber, really," I was now starting to feel stupid as he looked at me, "I wanted a break from the seriousness that Michelle is putting on me, that's all."

"Tony, I know how manipulative you can be, the whole Michelle dumping you, is something you made her think she was the one doing the dumping, when you keep putting yourself into every girl in Roundview…"

"Amber," Tony tried to choke on his drink, I could see his blue eyes focused so intense on mine, I couldn't help but break into a fit of giggles, the E finally hitting me, "You think that is all I do?" he asked trying to keep a straight face.

I'd lost all of my hold on the E feeling how my body was reacting, knowing I was going to have to work harder to keep myself together. "Think, no Tony," I pointed in his face with my drink safe in the other, "Know, yes." Now I could see Maxxie making out with another guy, I rolled my eyes knowing I wouldn't be staying at his house tonight. "Sorry Tony, but I'm going to find…" I glanced around the party, there was my exit, "Cassie!" I called as the girl looked up to me with a smile, "Bye Tony…"

I'd made sure I stuck with Cassie, out of the other girls, I felt better with Cassie, she wasn't boy crazy, just the regular crazy. "Wow, the colours are so, wow," Cassie was sitting with me in the kitchen again, "You make sure I won't eat?" she asked me, like she'd always ask.

"Sure Cass," I watched Chris on the other end, he'd found someone to cop hold of, and I was alone with Cassie as she was moving bake bean cans around, stacking them up high. "Cassie, am I harsh?" I asked feeling the room swimming around me, I'd lost all control as my body swayed from the music blasting from the living room.

Cassie quickly glanced to me, then back to the cupboard, "Well yes, and no," her voice always child soft, her eyes kept moving to the other food supplies, "You know guys just either want to get your virginity, other's thing you're a complete lesbian," she added sitting beside me, I now lit up a cigarette not feeling surprised.

"Lesbian," I whispered.

"Totally," Cassie added while taking the cigarette from my hand taking a pull handing it back, "but then you're like the totally hot lesbian, not a dyke," she smiled looking over my face, "People think it's because you spend so much time with Maxxie, a homosexual rub off."

I side glanced to Cassie, my drink empty, but I'd not bothered to get another, my cigarette burning down, I laughed, "Homosexuality doesn't work out like that,"

"I know that, but boys don't," her eyes found mine; I looked into her deep brown leaning forward for a heart beat.

"Cass…" Sid said breaking us apart from the stare, "Ber, Maxxie wanted me to let you know, he's pulled, and he'll fill you in tomorrow…" he kept staring at me and Cassie, "you two can still make out if you want to…" he looked hopeful.

"I'm gonna go find a way home," I slipped off the counter me and Cassie was sitting on, I could see people together, it was like couples were everywhere, well not couples, just people finding someone to get off with, forget the next day.

Even Michelle had found a new guy to thrust herself onto as I walked passed, I couldn't focused, maybe I was tripping, I'd forgotten how much I'd drunk, or smoke, pills, everything blurred into a big nothing as I bumped into someone. "Amber, you alright?" Anwar stood holding me still, I could see his eyes moving, his whole body moving, or was it my vision.

"I need to lay down," I couldn't control my voice, I closed my eyes trying to focus, but partly feeling sick, "Bathroom!" I snapped, then feeling someone pulling me up into their arms.

"Don't worry Ber, I'll get you somewhere safe," I could hear Maxxie's tone.

I opened my eyes to look up to his face trying to keep myself from upchucking all over him. "What, you pulled." I said trying to keep it in one sentence, so I could close my mouth again. Maxxie smiled.

He'd made it to a bathroom placing me down, "Not leaving you like this," he whispered as I now placed my head into the toilet feeling everything come up, "I'll have to remind you of this in future," he pulled my hair from my face.

"Please don't," I mumbled before feeling more chucks rising, "I'll just do it again," My voice husky as I now sat up looking to Maxxie as he'd gotten a flannel to wipe my face of any vomit.

"I know, but I don't want anyone taking advantage of you,"

"Yeah, Tony is on the roam…" I laughed feeling disappointed he'd not found me first.

Maxxie looked nervous, "He'd gotten off with Abby," he then laughed.

"The private school, crazy whore bitch?" I asked feeling surprised, but not overly concern.

Maxxie kept cleaning me up, "Yeah, left with her about half hour ago," he finished cleaning me up, a part of me was jealous, but I had to snap myself out of it, I didn't fancy Tony, I just didn't want to be involved with his mind games. "You ready to come home?" He finally asked lifting me to my feet, my eyes felt heavy, my body felt completely out of my control.

I shifted my arm to go around Maxxie's neck, my words not coming to my mouth, but Maxxie lifted me up again, "I'll take that as a yes then," he started to make our way out of the house, I let my eyes closed, for one thing was sure, I wasn't sure how I felt about anything anymore, but just wanted to get to sleep and put this night behind me.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"I'd like all course work to be handed in Monday please!" Angie said while everyone was picking bags up to leave the class room, Angie exhaled looking over the class hoping she'd gotten through to them how serious this was, "I'm not having anymore extensions on this paper please…"

I'd walked over to her desk, "I finished it this week," I placed my course work down, smiling I could feel Chris's hand on my waist. "I would of brought it in early, but…"

"You wasn't well, I heard," she now tried her hardest to ignore Chris; I knew very well how my cousin felt for our teacher.

"So Angie, about Monday…" he gave off his cheeky smile, I knew he hadn't even started the course work, let alone have it ready for Monday.

Angie sighed, "If you don't hand it in, I'll have to give you an incomplete, Chris, can you try," she added trying to ignore Chris's eyes, it made me fell awkward standing between them two.

"Angie, Angie, one little exception."

"Chris!" Angie and me stated at the same time, my eyes going onto his, his eyes looking over to Angie. "Chris you need to finish this, or I am going to fail you, why don't you have Amber help you," Angie smiled; she kept her attention on me now. "Can you Amber?"

I felt my face falling, my eyes going over to Chris as he was still grinning, "I'll try, but I'm going to be more likely to move heaven and earth," my voice dropped, I knew the chanced of getting Chris to do any work. "But I'll try."

Walking to the green with Chris, it was true, I'd spent most of the week off of college, the party left me ill for most of the week, I'd only came in today to hand in course work, but I still felt worn out, Chris on the other hands bursting with energy. "I owe you a million," he said while looking to everyone at the green.

I pulled my hair up into a messy bun, today was jogging bottoms and plan long sleeve top, my bag pulled over my shoulder ignoring Chris's good mood, "Chris, I'm not doing the work for you, I am helping you, you will come over my house to get it done," I now sat down seeing Maxxie smiling to me.

"Hey babes, you feeling better?" Maxxie asked me softly, moving his arm around my shoulder as I rested my head on his. I could see Chris sitting beside Anwar who was rolling up a spliff, Tony on his own as Sid was sitting with Cassie in front of him, he had his arms wrapped around her waist holding her close.

I glanced up to Maxxie for a moment I didn't want to remember the past week, "Much," I now glanced as Anwar was offering me the spliff, I waved my hand, so Maxxie took it instead, "Sorry, I am still de toxin," I politely kept smiling, but I felt my eyes glancing around the group. "Where are Michelle and Jal?" I felt it was odd without the two other girls.

Tony laughed, "They are doing something for Spanish class," he then took the spliff from Maxxie now trying to keep a straight face, "They've stop hating you if you want to know." He added focused on me.

"I don't care if they hate me or not," I finally said when taking out a bottle of water, I knew I was getting over what ever I was suffering from, now trying to take the hard look off my face, "I know that Jal follows Michelle trying to shield her from you," I added trying to make Tony see what was going on.

Maxxie cleared his throat taking the bottle of water from me, "so, what's with Chris coming over your house?" he wanted to change the subject, I knew the deal, mostly for the fact I was pretty sure it was an awkward topic, so it was better to change.

I laughed, "Tomorrow night, mum's going to France for the weekend," I added feeling like my Mum was always going some place or another for 'work'. I didn't ask too many questions.

"So how about a study party?" Anwar asked, he looked excited about the idea of another event around my place. I shot him a dirty look. "Or a small gathering of people to learn…" he sounded light.

"What I thought about it, but it's going to be only us, and no food fights, or messes that get me grounded," I pointed to Anwar, "also be nice for you to keep your clothes on," I looked at him with a wiggle of my eyebrows.

"Well Anwar, you might be in there," Tony elbowed him, but kept his eyes on me as I kept curled up to Maxxie, I sat up looking to Sid who holding the Spliff.

I reached over taking it from Sid, "Ok, Tony, Anwar isn't my type, Sorry dear…" I clenched my teeth taking a pull of the spliff; it had been so long since I last smoked so the feeling went straight to my head giving me a quick dizzy spell. "So tomorrow night, please, just us ok, no party, no crazy, just us catching up on work…"

"Deal," Maxxie felt good, I got a feeling he liked it was just us hanging out, even if we was catching up with college work, and possible have the odd can of larger. "I'll get some drinks and snacks," he glanced to me, "For the studying."

"Yes, studying," I glanced to Chris who was rolling his own spliff to light up, "Chris," I added.

"Studying, I get it," he inhaled his spliff closing his eyes, "Then I'll make it a study night worth having." He smirked as I hit him in the stomach with my water bottle watching him exhale with a cough.

"So I've left the money for the weekend in your account, that is to look after yourself," Gina said as I stood in her doorway, she was making sure she had everything for her flight. "No parties, I mean it," she pointed her passport at me, part of me hated this part of her going away, possibly the fact I was so used to it now.

I rolled my eyes, it was six o'clock, her flight was leaving at midnight as I kept looking into her room, "I know, no parties, no crazy sex," I giggled with the thought of me and ever having sex anytime soon. "Mum, really, I'm a good girl," I thought of what would happen tomorrow night, shrugged it off. "You have a flight, so stupid stressing about me, I'm seventeen nearly," I placed my hand on my hip.

"Are you sure you're feeling better," Gina pulled her carry on case that had her whole weekend packet, placing down; her hand touched my forehead, checking my eyes. "I can cancel this trip," she stated.

"Mum!" I pushed her back from trying to make sure I didn't have any kind of rash, I felt smothered by her, "I am fine, I really am, so you can go," I said as the buzzer to the flat went off, "That is Walter here to pick you up," I added looking serious.

"Ok, you and Maxxie be good, and don't get up to anything," she winked as I felt sick.

"Mum, me and Maxxie are not like you and Dad," I opened the front door; I couldn't believe it as I could see Maxxie making his way up the stairs.

Gina smiled to Maxxie, "thank you for keeping an eye on me, she's still a little ill," her voice concern when she walked down the stairs, Walter was already there to take her bag. "Be good…"

"You feeling bad again?" he sounded worried, then tried to put his hand on my forehead again.

"Maxxie!" I swatted his hand away from me, I didn't really like the idea of being worried about, "I'm fine, not sick, and I told her that so you can stay here with me," I added heading to the living room. "It's your flaming idea for everyone being here," I added looking out the living room window as Walter's car pulled away from the estate, "A idea I don't want to go so, so badly," I bit my lip feeling Maxxie standing behind me looking out the window.

"Amber, did I ever tell you how over dramatic you are," he said as I glanced up to him, "Well it's not like we're going to trash the place again…"

"Better not," I shut the curtain trying to relax about what was going to happen or not happen.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:** Ok, so the thing is, I feel so bad that I neglected this story for so long, so my goal is to have this finished before the end of October, or at least before the end of November.  
For the people who have alerted this and waited long for updates, I am deeply sorry, I feel like I've started something, and left you hanging, I promise I won't leave you hanging any more... Happy Reading, and remember to Read and Review...

* * *

**Chapter 6**

Standing in front of the dishwasher I passed Maxxie a plate, I kept my eyes on the time feeling nervous. "This is really stressing me," I confessed as Maxxie took the plate, he glanced up to him, "I mean last time didn't work well," I added remembering New years party that ended with my home being a bomb site.

"Amber," Maxxie had closed the dishwasher after putting a tablet in, "I've told you, this is just going to be, you, me, Anwar, Chris, Sid, Cassie and Tony," he then paused, "also I invited Michelle and Jal." His eyes kept focused on mine.

"So pretty much no one else?" I asked feeling my breath catching in my throat, I knew everyone would be turning up soon, but it didn't stop my nerves.

Maxxie took his hands holding my face, I could feel he was really getting my attention, "I won't let you down," he kept focused on me, "So please relax," he rested his forehead on mine, but I couldn't help but smile.

"Ok, Maxxie," I sighed feeling my arms holding him; he hugged onto me kissing my forehead lightly. "Sorry, I just feel like such a worry wart," closing my eyes trying to control the worry of tonight.

Maxxie squeezed me before letting me go, "So, you need a little something," he walked over to his bag taking out a bottle of Jack Daniels.

"Thanks," I took the bottle placing it on the counter, "Anything else?" I asked feeling my smile break over my face, Maxxie nodded. In his bag was a tin box of already rolled spliffs. "More like it…"

"Yeah," he placed one in his mouth lightly up, I could hear the buzzer, "You get that, I'll get food and drink sorted," Maxxie inhaled and exhaled the smoke as I walked out into hallway.

I pressed the intercom, "WHATUP!" Anwar's voice shouted, I laughed.

"Come in guys," I pressed the enter button, I felt better knowing it was going to be just the gang, even better since it had been a long while since it was just us hanging out. "They're here…" I called as Maxxie walked into the hallway holding his history book and spliff hanging out his mouth.

"Cool," Maxxie walked into the living room, I straightened out my long baggy shirt, my leggings cutting off at the middle of my calves, finally I'd made sure my hair was perfect, something I always wanted to take pride in when I could. "Oh, they have a Musical marathon!" Maxxie cheered from the living room making me giggle.

I opened the front door, as I guessed Anwar, Chris, Sid and Cassie were first to arrive, I smiled letting them pass, most of them kicking shoes off getting ready for a night in, mainly the fact boys were jogging bottoms and ratty shirts, Cassie typical strange outfit of purple dress with green tights, "Like Wow, Amber, you're house is so lovely…" she smiled in her daze, no one knew if it was her, or a combination of medication and drugs.

Sid sighed, "Cass, you've been here before," he tried to look to me with a 'sorry for my crazy girlfriend face'; Chris laughed rushing to the kitchen.

"It's ok, Maxxie is setting up the living room, so remember we're catching up with college work," I pointed out seeing Anwar follow Chris into the kitchen. "I'm just saying," I muttered more to myself following Sid and Cassie into the living room.

Sid now sat on the floor, he'd gotten a notebook out, mostly pretending to be reading over the no notes he'd taken. Cassie on the other hand was organizing the snack table that Maxxie had done that afternoon. "So, we're gonna be studying?" Sid asked finally as I picked up my laptop from the armchair, I held it under my arm nodding, "Fuck," he then glanced around. "You by any chance, know what topic we're going for History?"

Maxxie placed his face in to the palm of his hand, "You've got to be kidding me Sid!" Maxxie lifted his face up looking at him blankly, "This is a study party, first part, STUDY!"

"Yeah, and I just thought it was a thing Amber told her mum so we can be here…" Sid added while watching Chris and Anwar enter the living room loaded up with cans of larger.

I waved my hands, "Right, I am going to say this once, that is one time for those who didn't pay attention in basics, I am trying to get my cousin through college," I feel down onto the sofa as the buzzer went off again, I got to my feet again leaving my laptop behind. "I'll get that, everyone better be doing something college related when I return," I felt myself dragging myself into the hallway pressing the intercom.

"Hello, Michelle and Jal here," I could hear Michelle's voice was cheerful, I couldn't believe that girl at times, but then I pressed the enter button, inhaling through my nose, exhaling through my mouth as I opened the front door again. Seeing Michelle in her comfy jeans and vest top, Jal baggy jumper and leggings I tried my hardest to smile. It wasn't as if I didn't like them, it was that I felt I didn't have anything in common with either of them. "I wanted to say sorry about Monday," Michelle looked awkward standing in the doorway, Jal slipping out of her trainers, she'd handed me a bottle of vodka with her laptop bag heading to living room. It was just Michelle and me there.

"Why would that be Michelle?" closed the front door behind her, as much as I wasn't expecting an apology from Michelle, I couldn't help but drag it out placing my hand on my hip watching her.

Michelle sighed, "Look, I shouldn't believe that you'd be the type to fall for Tony, but you have to understand," she brushed her curls behind her ear, "he's a high maintenance guy, and to be honest, he's not really your type…"

"And that was you saying sorry for being a complete bitch to me Michelle, that Tony isn't my type…?" I asked with everything I could, just to stop myself from slapping her in the face.

Michelle bit her lip, "No, it's just," she exhaled, "You and Tony are friends, and I see you talk, and I assumed."

"Assumed that like every girl with out any self respect or self worth, I'd want to be a notch on his bed post." I shrugged, "Sorry, I'm not that kinda girl, but for now, I'll take that as some what of an apology and you may stay." I held my hand out to welcome her, and she placed bottle of wine into my open hand.

"Thanks Ber," Michelle flipped her flats off heading to my living room, I glanced to the bottle of vodka in one, the wine in the other.

Buzz, the thing was starting to do my head in, I placed the bottles down on the side table, I pressing the button, "What!" I shouted.

"Wow Ber, nice to feel welcome," Tony's voice was clear through the intercom, and I felt like hitting my head on the wall, I simply pushed the enter button for the last time.

"Chris," I felt my head bang into my arms as I sat on the sofa; Chris was beside me looking to my laptop screen, "Naked lady cards on my solitaire!" I felt my hands brush into my hair before smacking him with a sofa cushion. "I gave you my notes, I've talk through what you have to do, and you're playing solitaire," I smothered my own face with the cushion, I wanted to die right that moment. "I need more drink," getting to my feet I walked into the kitchen.

"Amber…" Chris shouted after me, part of me would have said something back, but I needed a place to get my head clear. I told Jal she could go into my room to practice her clarinet. I walked into the kitchen seeing Tony sitting at the table with his laptop open. I tried to be quiet looking over his shoulder looking at his writing.

"This isn't anything I've got as work," I whispered making him jump out of focus, his eyes turning to look into mine.

He broke in to a smile, "Amber, you scared the shit out of me," he closed the window down before I could get a better look at to what he was typing. "Thought you was helping your cousin not fail out of college?" he asked as I slipped into the chair next to him.

"Yes and at the same time, find a cure for all cancer, and marry Jesse Spencer," I smiled resting my face on the palm of my hand as I looked to the ceiling hoping to get rid of the thudding in my brain.

"Jesse Spencer?" Tony looked puzzled.

I smiled nodding, "He plays Chase in House, and I would die to have him say dirty things to me in that accent…" I sighed trying to forget I was here.

Tony moved off his chair, I watched as he walked over to the fridge, he took out a bottle of JD, then freeze taking a few cubs of ice placing them into a glass pouring the JD into the glass handing me it. "You have a weird taste in men," he stated while laughing, "But nice to know you have a sexual appetite…" his voice as smooth as always, but I kept my eyes on the glass taking a slow sip.

"Tony, just because I'm choosing to save myself for someone, who won't take it as a trophy, doesn't mean I don't have ideas of what I like." I laughed, "I just like to think I'd know the person I'll have sex with, will be someone I can smile and think, that was nice," I glanced up to Tony staring at me, "Yes, I mean it."

"Well," he glanced over my face, "Guess you have a point," he started to make himself a drink; he placed his glass near mine as he sat down again. "But by waiting, you're just making it impossible for anyone to get close to you," he kept his voice low, "For all you know, you might end up shagging Maxxie cos he's the only guy you let in…"

"Anthony Stonem!" I snapped feeling my eyes glaze over, "Maxxie is my best friend, plus I am not going to have sex with my very gay friend." I downed the rest of my drink, "Why you have to be like this?"

I went to leave feeling him holding my hand, my eyes staring to how his fingers held onto mine, I hated that my heart skipped, it wasn't like in the movies, it was worse, I couldn't stand it. "Amber, I'm sorry," he said I could see behind his eyes, I knew how his brain was working.

"Tony, I'm not a pawn in your game, I have feelings, and I really want to be friends, but not when you are acting like this," I brushed my hair behind my ear talking my hand back from his. "Stop trying it on with me, and you might still have a friend in me," I rolled my eyes walking out of the kitchen feeling like crap.

Michelle and Jal sat going over their Spanish vocabulary, I could see Sid and Cassie cuddled up on a armchair, she was talking him about his History paper, even if she didn't take history, she was doing the best she could to help.

Maxxie had taken over with Chris, finally Anwar was sitting with his game boy advance, I rolled my eyes, but didn't want to say anything, I kept looking to my English paper, I really didn't like that we were doing a midsummer nights dream, I'd claimed my laptop back from Chris as I typed carefully my thoughts of the themes, I'd not even notice that Tony had come into the room, sat on a sofa next to Maxxie, his eyes looking over the room to me.

"I think we need a break," I said while closing my laptop up, I tried to keep myself avoiding the need to look at Tony, I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of knowing I was thinking about him. I hated that even while trying to write a paper, I kept having him creep into my thoughts.

Chris jumped up; "Yes!" he glanced as everyone stared at him, my eyes focused. "I mean, that would be lovely," he kept smiling.

"So what idea?" Maxxie asked as I brushed my hand over my imaginary beard.

I knew I looked like a complete dork, but it there had to be something to do to make some fun from this long evening.

Tony grinned, "Well we've done a lot tonight, so how about a little truth or dare?" he kept his voice cool.

Michelle blinked, "Yes Tony, cos we are all thirteen," she folded her arms; she had that typical Michelle attitude.

"Truth or dare sounds fun," I kept my eyes away from Michelle's for once, I wanted to have fun, it had been too long since we'd done something like this. "So I think we should totally do it," I now found an empty vodka bottle. "So who's first…?" I crinkled my nose as I kept a perfect grin on my face.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"You know how sad this is?" Jal said while looking to the bottle placed in the centre of a circle we had made in the middle of the living room. I felt maybe Jal was right, but at this moment I knew that I couldn't give her any idea of how right her question was.

I cleared my throat, "Well it's this, or Chris's idea of watching music videos, and seeing how many nipples you can see." I glanced over to Chris who was giving thumbs up as I rolled my eyes. "Chris, not all of us like to look at tits."

"Oh come on!" Chris kept grinning; Michelle sitting next to him gave him a light slap on the back of the head making his stare at her. "Ok, ok, not tits."

"Good, now back to the game," I felt weird, the last time I remember playing any kind of truth or dare was at Sid's fourteenth birthday, it ended with Chris running around the garden naked and Sid's mum nearly having a heart attack. "I think I'll roll it first," I took the bottle, my eyes going around the circle. Chris was sitting with Michelle to his right; he had Jal the other side of him, with Sid and Cassie next to Jal, Finally Tony, me, Maxxie and Anwar.

Everyone watched as the bottle spun round on the carpet, I kept my eyes focused, out of the corner of my eye I could see Chris sparking up a spliff, "So, how are we going to work this out?" Chris asked taking in the smoke and exhaling quickly.

"I didn't think about that…" I replied as the bottle slowly stopped on Jal, her eyes going to me, "Ok, well we can ask truth or dare." I simply looked to Jal who was having regret about the game now.

Jal folded her arms, "I don't know, Truth…" she said while trying to keep a straight face, Chris next to her exhaled in a huffing sigh sound that made him look stupid. "What I get to choose Chris, and I want a truth."

"Yes, typically safe of you," Chris now looked over to me, it was like I had a big evil plan up my sleeve, I glanced over to Jal. "Well…" Chris added.

"Hey, I'm thinking!" I snapped at my cousin, he really was impatient, "Ok Jal," I started trying to think of anything to ask.

"Was it really you snogging Mark Abeles behind the bike shed in year nine?" Chris asked before I could open my mouth to ask my question, I felt like I could have slapped him, but then it was Chris.

Jal stared at him blank for a while, "No, that was Michelle," Jal glanced to her friend as she looked shocked by what Jal had confessed.

"JAL!" she shouted while looking over to Chris who was looking chuffed for himself, and she slapped him again while he was inhaling the pull for his spliff making him cough. "You are such a idiot." Her voice was trying to calm down.

"What," Chris didn't even know what he'd done, but Michelle took the spliff from him and taking a long pull, I could tell that Mark Abeles wasn't a guy she wanted to remember, but then I remembered Mark was one of the weirdest guys in our year who used the pick his ear and eat it.

I laughed smiling to Michelle, "If it makes you feel better, I kissed him once," I leaned over taking the spliff, she gave me a quick smile to say thank you, "Ok, Jal," I tried to make the game fun again as Jal took the bottle spinning it quickly.

The bottle spun around, again everyone watched, I on the other hand closed my eyes feeling the smoke going into my lungs, exhaling getting that buzz I was happy to get passing the spliff over to Maxxie as the bottle stopped on Chris. "Yes mate!" he looked exciting picking up his drink, he chugged some down turning to Jal, "Come on, give me a good dare!" he egged her on, I knew my cousin too well to know that he wasn't scared of anything.

"Right Chris," Jal rubbed her hands together, her eyes looked creepy as she finally broke into a grin, "You have to dress in something of Amber's I mean one of her pulling outfits, and go downstairs, and ask them if they've got a spare vagina you can borrow…" she kept looking pleased.

I burst into a fit of giggles, "Oh my," I help my hand over my mouth, "Chris don't you dare ruin my favourites," I pointed as he'd already jumped up to raid my closet, I knew him too well. "Someone, go with him!" I picked up my camera throwing it to Maxxie as he'd gotten up to help.

"I'll record it," he grinned rushing after Chris, I couldn't believe it, but then long run I didn't see Chris scared to put on a girls outfit, let alone go and ask the question Jal gave him.

After about ten minutes, I heard the door shut as Chris and Maxxie returned. Chris was wearing my black and purple lace boobtube, a mini skirt, even my leather knee-high new rock boots, he'd even put on lip gloss grinning at me, "So Cuz, do I look sexy?" he posed as Maxxie snapped a photo for me to remember this.

"Chris, you look," I could see his feet were bigger than mine, "Those must be killing your feet?" I asked as Chris flopped down on the sofa.

"Oh Chris!" Michelle turned away, as he'd flashed the whole room.

Chris didn't care, "Sorry, commando day," he pulled the boots off throwing them into the corner of the room. "How do you walk in these?" he added before sitting back on the floor.

"Chris!" I held my hand up, "Go change, I really don't want to have to guard my eyes all night," I reached over to my drink feeling nervous, "and please be careful with that top, I like it," I watched him picking up my boots walking out the room.

"Well Chris's go next to spin," I said taking my drink knocking it back, I knew that what ever it landed on, Chris wasn't going to be light on them. I glanced over to Anwar holding the last of the spliff, "Mind?" leaned over, Anwar shrugged handing me it, and I closed my eyes inhaling, exhaling. Then passed to Tony as he kept smiling to me, "What?"

"Nothing," he inhaled, he passed the spliff to Sid to finish off, I kept looking at Tony, "Just I like you better in that skirt," he winked as I lightly shoved him.

"Don't be a perv Tony," I muttered as I could see Chris was wearing his normal clothes again. "Come on Christopher…" I knew he didn't like his full name, he gave me a dirty look as he spun the bottle, I knew that he was hoping.

When the bottle slowed down, I felt my heart stop, but the bottle skipped passed me and landed on Tony, I felt my stomach twist even more, I knew that Tony wasn't going to be a wimp, and I kept my eyes closed.

"Well Chris," Tony sipped his drink while smirking, I kept my eyes on him hoping this wasn't going to come and bit me in the arse. "I think I'll be brave and face the dare," Tony looked over to him; part of him was hoping it would be a good dare.

Chris cleared his throat, everyone was watching him closely, it was Chris, of course he was going to made his dare as rude or inappropriate at possible to out do Jal's dare. "Right Tony," he was being dramatic now, "Your dare, you have to," I knew it, Chris's eyes were on me, "I want you to whispered the kinkiest thing into Amber's ear." He looked so smug with himself.

I felt my stomach turn, it was hard to even try to predict what was going to happen, everything went to the sound of my heart beating in my chest heavy, hard and my palms started to sweat as I felt Tony move passed Maxxie to me, his hand moved my hair carefully away from my ear. I could see Michelle looking away, obviously she didn't want to watch, and she knew Tony as well as I did.

His breath was warm on my neck, he stood so close to me, his hand rested softly on my shoulder, he kept quiet, and it sent shivers down my spine making me take shallow breathes. He licked his lips lightly; I knew I was going to explode if he didn't say anything soon. "Amber," Tony's voice was husky as he tried to make sure no one would hear but me. "I'd lay you down, kiss every part of you," his voice sending shivers over me, I couldn't help but picture it. "Amber," even him saying my name made me feel my heart pounding louder. "You'd feel everything, I'd take my time licking you, making you come before you'd feel me inside you, I'll be careful, I'll make you remember it," his voice purred as I caught my breath feeling it harder to breathe. "I want you Amber…" his last works caught me off guard, everyone around us were quiet trying to hear what he'd said, but I couldn't look away from his eyes.

The longest silence was around us, I couldn't think, I could breathe, "Wow, Amber, you're like blushing…" Cassie broke the silence as I quickly got to my feet.

"I need to," I rushed out the room feeling a complete idiot now, but I slammed the bathroom door behind me, I focused on myself in the mirror seeing my cheeks had flushed pink, my pupils were dilated, holding onto the sink I took deep breaths, finally looking over myself again.

The door knocked not soon after I'd entered, "Ber, you ok?" Maxxie asked from the other side, he was always going to be the one to worry about me; I turned opening the bathroom door, my eyes focused. "What did he say to you?" Maxxie looked concerned.

"Nothing, just Tony being Tony," I broke into a smile, "Just I was a little," I swallowed hard.

"Did he turn you on?" Maxxie whispered, it was the first time in our whole friendship he'd ever asked me such a question. I couldn't help but give a quick nod. "Oh my God Amber…"

"Shh Maxxie," I held my hand up quickly, "It's nothing, seriously…" I moved from the bathroom, I looked up to Maxxie trying to keep a straight face, but instead I pulled him into a hug hiding my face into his chest. "Please don't say anything…" I added trying to calm myself down.

"I promise," Maxxie rubbed my back; we stood there for a moment before heading back to the group.

I wished something would of happened to change the way I could feel when I saw Tony looking my way, but as much as what he said sounded good. I didn't want to fall into the trap, even if he meant it, I could never believe anything he said. Tony was a womaniser and I couldn't trust him.

* * *

**A/N:** Ok, so pretty much I am going to be updating this fast and furious, I do hope that you guys are enjoying where this is going, I'm so happy that I've gotten back into this tale, maybe I needed the time away to help me get my direction.  
Big thank you to Katt for helping me be inspired to add to this story again, as we both know I got you into the magical world of Skins...  
Also on another note, I started a Generation two Skins fan fic, so check The Perfect Distraction  
I hope to continue this asap ^-^


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Monday I'd sat in English class, it was early, but as I kept looking to the front of the class, I couldn't look back at Tony, he sat only a few tables behind me, but part of me couldn't stop thinking about him. I hated that I was thinking about him, it was hard to finish my English paper thinking of what Tony had whispered into my ear that night.

"Right, I hope that everyone will be able to come to the London showing of A midsummer nights dream," Danielle Spencer our nervous English teacher said looking to the class as if we were going to eat her whole. "I've booked the hotel for those who will be coming this weekend, and I'll need the last of the payments," she nodded trying to reassure herself that everything was going to be ok.

"So, this hotel stay, how will it work out?" Tony asked with a smile, I turned to see the smug look on his face, Sid sitting next to him trying to give me a sorry expression.

Danielle inhaled, "Well, it will be two to a room, as I've only got about a hand full of you able to make it, I'll be sharing a room, as Angela is happy to help me with everything." Her eyes glanced over Tony's face, "but rooms will be same sex," she looked as if the idea of sex on her watch would be a hanging offence.

"Angie's going," Chris's voice sounded highly disappointed, "Damn, I wished I, Hey Sid, want to give me your."

"No!" Sid snapped, he gave Chris a dirty look, "Me and Cassie have been planning to see this play," he added quickly as Cassie touched his hand with a smile, and Sid nodded towards her to prove he put her first.

Maxxie glanced to me, I could see that since I told him more about what Tony said to me Sunday; he'd been trying to get more information about how I felt about Tony. I glanced to the front of the class again feeling Maxxie nudging me with his elbow, "You alright about the trip still?" he mouth to me, he glanced back to Tony, back to me trying to keep a straight face.

I didn't look back anymore, I felt my stomach knotting, I could see Michelle on the same table watching Tony, probably wanting to use this weekend away to get back together with Tony, and I didn't know why I felt so jealous, I didn't care, I shouldn't care. "I'm fine," I mouthed back, the bell went getting every ones attention, most people picking up their belongings to go to next class.

"Remember, I still need payments for some of you, and if you don't pay, you don't go…" Danielle called over the room as everyone was making their way to the door to get out quickly.

"Green?" Maxxie asked me as we walked out of the class together, I kept glancing behind me seeing Tony wrapping an arm around Michelle. Again my eyes avoided his, going to Maxxie.

I'd taken this time to quicken my pace, "Sure, I just need to stop at the girls rest room first," I tapped Maxxie's arm; it was hard for me to avoid the feeling. "I'm fine really," I knew he was going to ask before he'd started.

It didn't take too long for me close the door behind me again. Why was I getting this way? Tony was Tony no matter how much I tried to ignore the feeling grabbing my chest; it was tight as I glanced into the mirror. "You're like totally in love with Tony," Cassie said, I stared up to the mirror seeing Cassie only a few feet behind me, she looked simple, her face calm.

"Cassie, I don't know what you're talking about," I replied, I slowly turned to look at Cassie feeling my stomach turn. "I don't love Tony, he's a friend, a jerk and so not my type…"

"Wow, you sound almost believable when I tell my parents I'm eating," she placed her hand on her hips, "It's not hard to tell that Saturday night, he pushed a button," her voice cheerful, "you need to tell him, this weekend…"

"No, no," I shook my head quickly, "Cassie, I don't have to tell Tony anything, plus it's clear he's back with Michelle, I'm not his type anyway," I now moved close to the door trying to avoid Cassie's stare.

Cassie's hand touched my arm, "Amber, you're not going to be able to hide it forever," she said as I walked out leaving her behind, I couldn't believe that she was pushing me, I wasn't going to give.

I'd pushed the conversation out of my mind, I knew that me, Maxxie and Sid had a free period as I strolled to the green, but then it was typical for Chris to skip his Maths lesson to get in a sneaky spliff before psychology, "Ber, took your time," Chris said holding the spliff out for me, I sat down with him taking a drag feeling better. "So, I was thinking, if I make my way to London, one of you let me sneak into your hotel…" he sounded enthusiastic about his plan.

"Chris, you get lost at the local supermarket, let alone getting to London theatre." I passed the spliff to Sid, "Plus you really need to drop the whole Angie thing," I added playing with the grass, part of me wished it was that simple.

"You know Amber," Chris pointed to me, "I only think you are jealous," he kept focused on me.

I laughed taking the spliff back from Sid, "Jealous, oh cos I'm a lesbian," I nodded inhaling again, this time holding it on my chest longer, "I mean, damn, I wanna eat her out so bad, man I love vagina!"

Maxxie was in a full fit of laughter as he held his ribs, it wasn't hard to tell that I was putting it on, partly I wasn't even sure what Chris was getting at, he kept starting at me. "Ber, are you joking?" Chris asked looking worried.

Sid looked confused; "Well she was going to make out with Cassie at that party two weeks ago…"

"I'm not GAY Sid, and I was high, so of course the E made me want to kiss everyone…" I then pulled my knees close to my chest taking in another drag of the spliff handing it over to Maxxie. "I'm not gay, I like penis,"

"But you've never had sex right?" Sid spoke careful, part of him kept a safe distance from me as I glared. "Right…" he backed off.

I got to my feet now, "Right, I'm gonna go library, I have a report to write about conflicts in countries due to religion." Pulling my bag up my shoulder I reached my hands into my pockets, I felt like my virginity was seriously getting to be a pain in the arse.

Walking through the books I didn't even know what I was looking for, part of me made the paper up, I was the only one to take religious education, I did the paper days ago, but anything to get away from the awkward questions. I hated that out of all the gang, I was the only virgin; I'd thought I'd lose mine before Sid, but when he got with Cassie. Well it wasn't too long before they'd got to it.

I kept wondering when a felt something hit my foot, "Ow!" I snapped, I reached down to the book that fell off the shelf; I picked it up seeing a tall guy with mousy brown mess hair rushing over to me.

"I am, so sorry," he glanced from the book in my hand, to my face, "I didn't mean to, it's just I was on the other side, I pulled, and that fell." He kept smiling nervous.

Part of me would have been pissed off, but my eyes catching his, he wasn't bad looking as he kept watching me, "It's ok, I'll live," I placed the book back on the shelf, I didn't know why, but he looked I've seen him before.

"I'm Tom, Tomas Sawyer to be precise…" he looked cheerful.

I nodded, "I'm Amber Miles,"

"I know we have English, History, psychology and religious education together." He kept smiling and I felt bad about having this cute guy right under my nose.

I shifted from one foot the other, "Oh, well I never really," I bobbed my head, this was weird, "So you going to the English trip?" I asked while playing with my hair carefully.

Tom played with his hands in his pockets, I didn't know why I felt weird, and maybe it was the first time I was talking to someone out of my group, my comfort zone.

Tom broke into another grin, "Yeah, I mean, I'm going, yeah," he bit onto his bottom lip, I watched him brushed a stray piece of hair behind his ear, he kept smiling, and it made me smile more.

"Cool," I felt like I was having a moment, "Maybe we can meet up sometime, not on college grounds, and well," I waved a hand trying to make a jester I didn't understand.

"It would be nice, I've kinda been admiring you from afar," he looked shy as he said that line, I brushed my hand into my hair.

I didn't really know what to say, "Wow," I whispered, "Well maybe I can give you my number," I took my mobile phone out of my pocket, I flipped up the keypad, "You can give me yours if you like…" I added with a bigger smile.

Tom reached into his pocket taking out a mobile, he passed his to me, "You can put it in," I nodded handing him mine, we exchanged numbers, I took my back after with a feeling that it was a good day.

"So, I'll text you sometime," I placed my phone back into my pocket feeling my chest lighten up, he nodded.

"Yeah, I'll maybe text back with a cool idea," he pointed to the time, "Plus I have a class to get to," he pointed to the time.

I looked to the clock on the wall, "Oh Shit," I slapped my forehead, "I've got to meet with my Cousin to go over his paper quickly." I felt bad about having to rush off and leave him, but as I glanced back to Tom, I gave a quick wave, I run down the hall feeling giddy, I might of found a good guy, and prove to everyone I wasn't interested in Tony Stonem.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

I pulled my mobile towards me as I lay in bed, the alert sound letting me know I'd gotten another text message made me smile. It was just after midnight as I glanced over the message Tom just sent me.

_Thinking of you, hate boredom. Why you up to?_

I rolled on my stomach, I didn't really know what to say, part of me wanted to sleep, but if I could get a few more texts with Tom, it would be worth it, even if I knew that tomorrow I'd see him. We decided to sit together while watching the play; I'd still needed to introduce him to the gang. That is what scared me the most, the idea of letting them pick him apart.

_In bed, got to sleep, big day tomorrow ;)_

I sent the message rolling onto my back again, it was feeling like a girlie girl, or was it the idea that I'd finally found a guy, a sweet caring guy that maybe. It wasn't even a week yet, and I was thinking about it, but I knew that it was going to be a while; I still wanted to make sure it was the right time, right person. I just wanted it to be perfect.

I stared at the ceiling, it didn't seem like the week had gone by that quick, part of me wondered what the others had done with the week, I'd not seen any of them since Monday, mostly spending time with Tom, He took me to see a movie, we went to burger king. Not much of a date, but it was nice, I knew he had two older sisters, twins, his Dad was a fire fighter, his mother was a house wife type.

All I could tell him was, my mother was a lawyer who has clients that take her all over the place, and my dad was gay who was a personal assistant to the local newsreader. It was nice to talk to someone who didn't seem to judge me, or even push me into anything. My alert snapped me out of my bubble.

Yeah, big day. Sleep well and I'll see you at college 3

I jumped up, for the first time he'd typed something cute at the end of the message, I felt my hands shake a little feeling excited, do I text back? Do I play it cool and leave him guessing? I took a deep breath calling the only person, and then I stopped. I could simply talk to Maxxie in the morning on the bus ride to school.

When my alarm snapped me from my dream, I opened my eyes lightly, I could see I was still holding onto my phone, I kept the message open looking at the little less than three that made a love heart. I'd spent so long analysing that little heart I couldn't start to imagine what it could mean to him.

I'd taken my time getting ready for college, glancing into the mirror finishing off my eyeliner, I glanced over my outfit, it was a pair of skinny jeans faded with a oversize white t-shirt with make love not war, with a purple vest top underneath.

Perfect straight hair, slipping my converses on, I glanced to my phone seeing that I'd missed a call from Maxxie. I pressed the call button listening to the ring, "Amber, Hey!" Maxxie's voice cheerful, I didn't know what I would do without hearing that happy tone on the other end of the phone.

"You called, I missed, so I called back," I said looking at my bag that I had my night clothes, everything ready for spending the night in a hotel, part of me was nervous about the night away, I knew that I said I'd stay with Cassie, but she was planning to sneak away with Sid, typical everyone was a sex beast but me.

I could hear Maxxie's music in the background, so I had a better feeling knowing Maxxie was still home, "I was wondering, since you've been AWOL, I wanted the gossip," he chuckled, but with Maxxie I would could put it as a giggle, "I didn't know if I was going to see you again, are we still travel to college together?"

"Maxxie, I'm ready, so meet you downstairs," I glanced to the clock on my bedside table, I inhaled, "I promise I'll let you in on all the ins and outs of my secret," I smiled to myself picking my bag up.

"Well you better, I've missed you," Maxxie finally replied, I did miss him too, but then I knew as soon as he knew what I was up to, he'd be excited. "Well see you soon, byes" as of that the phone went dead as I pushed my phone back into my pocket.

"Mum, I'm off, I'll see you when I get back," I called, I didn't hear anything, so I just assumed that she'd already left for work, I picked my door key from the table in the hall, I pushed them into my bag, I felt this was going to be a good weekend.

"Oh my God, you're alive!" Maxxie called as he was walking towards me in the car park, I glanced over his baggy jeans, smart polo shirt, "I can't believe I've not seen you in forever…" he stopped in front of me wrapping his arms around me. I hugged him back feeling good about being able to finally tell me.

"I got a boyfriend," I finally said as I pulled out of the hug. I couldn't believe I was finally saying it out loud, and it felt amazing to be able to tell someone.

Maxxie stood in front of me, he kept staring, "I knew it," I pointed, we started to make our way to the bus stop, "I mean, you look practically glowing," he held my hand as we walked, "So you need to tell me all the details." He was more excited about this than I was, but I felt good that I had someone on my side.

I laughed, "His name is Tom, brown hair, hazel eyes," I smiled thinking of him, "He likes Kings of Leon, dresses like a Mosher, and he reads murder mysteries and loves photography," I felt giddy talking about Tom, but I felt weird being I was bragging.

Maxxie on the other hand nodded and smiled, "He sounds amazing, so when do I get to approve of this Tom?" he stopped at the bus stop placing his bag down, I placed mine down too.

"Well, he's coming on the trip, so you'll be seeing him soon," I replied fishing in my bag for my bus pass, I never thought I'd be this nervous about tom meeting the gang, but I knew it was a matter of time. "Just be nice, he's not like us…" I added feeling worse.

Maxxie raised his eyebrow, "Not like us how?"

"Meaning, he doesn't know I," I made a smoking gesture, "And he doesn't know that, and I'm slowly bringing him to that idea…" I found my bus pass placing it into my pocket looking for the bus.

Maxxie nodded, "Ahh, I see," he then found his own bus pass, "I mean, explains the fact I've not seen him before, and how you meet him?" he kept watching me, part of me felt truly under the microscope.

"Library, I found him there, he's in most my classes, and admired me from afar…" I felt like a complete dork now, but lifting my bag from the ground seeing the bus coming into view sticking my hand out. "I think he's nice, so I just hope everyone else don't scare him off." I added feeling I needed to get that idea out.

Maxxie rolled his eyes, "We'll be nice, plus it not like he's got to face," he looked to me, "Chris is going to be a dick,"

"Chris is going to be a big dick, he sees me as a baby sister," I added showing my bus pass to the drive getting onto the bus; Maxxie wasn't too far behind me.

"But, you're like, three months older than him?" Maxxie asked sitting next to me, the bus started to move again.

I laughed, "Yeah, but boy logic, he's a boy so I must be the little sister that needs protecting," I pulled my bag onto my lap watching the road, then back to Maxxie, "I really need some advice," I took my phone out going to the text message, "What does that mean?" I showed him Tom's last message.

"Oh my," Maxxie glanced from the message to my face, he pinched my cheek lightly, "looks like someone is falling for the Miles charm," he cooed as slapped his hand away.

I laughed feeling better about the day, "Oh shh, I have no charm, just a natural elegance," I focused on the route, I knew Maxxie would be supportive, now it was just everyone else I needed to worry about.

"Ok, everyone," Angie called over the crowds of us standing outside the college, the coach just arrives, "I want everyone to remember we are representing Roundview college, and I want everyone to be on their best behaviour," she glanced to Danielle who seemed to be having a mini breakdown.

I kept feeling nervous, I didn't like that Tom was late, but we never set a time, and I kept glancing to Maxxie. "Don't worry," he whispered looking around for the person I describes.

"What are you two on?" Tony asked as he placed his bag down near Maxxie's, so far everyone was here, I could see Michelle and Jal gossiping, Sid and Cassie talking about, well I never knew what they talked about, but it was always something no one got.

"Berie," Tom's voice caught me off guard as he made his way through the crowds to get to me, I felt his smile instantly making me smile. "I've been looking everywhere for you," he stopped seeing every one of my friends now staring at me.

"Tom," I reached my hand out to take his, "This is, Maxxie, Sid, Cassie, Michelle, Jal, Anwar and Tony." I pointed out, my stomach was doing that twisty thing again as I smiled to Tom, "Everyone, this is Tom, my boyfriend," I hugged close to him, trying to keep myself calm.

"Wow, you're messy looking," Cassie was the first to speak; I kept my eyes up to Tom's.

Tom laughed, "Yeah, I was rushed this morning," he brushed his hand into his hair, "I've heard a lot about you guys…" he sounded as nervous as I felt.

"Well, it's ok," Maxxie held his hand out, "I think I can approve of you," his touched my arm, Maxxie kept smiling, so I knew I could relax. "You have my blessing," he joked to Tom.

Tony on the other hand, I couldn't put a word to what was going across his face, "Funny Tom, I've never heard of you, how long you two been hooking up?" his tone was dry; it was enough to make everyone stare at him.

"Tony…" Michelle finally said while stepping forward looking to Tom, "Ignore Tony, he's just a little cranky in the morning," she pushed herself in front of Tony, her eyes looking him over, "Just know, you're lucky her cousin isn't here, Chris is very protective." She nodded.

Tom stopped, then looked to me, "Chris, as in,"

"Chris, that is my cousin," I added feeling nervous now.

"So, that is your cousin, he is the guy that does all the pills and crazy shit?" Tom looked relaxed, he smiled again, "I've always wondered how anyone could be that crazy, makes me a little jealous." He added looking to everyone waiting for my reaction.

I shrugged, "Well, It's a great way to pass the time," I then looked over to Sid, "I've made sure I brought enough spliff for everyone," I avoided looking to Tom, I wasn't going to pretend I didn't smoke, or drink.

"Cool," Tom now kissed my cheek, "I got some stuff too," he whispered while I broke into a smile feeling better about the weekend, but as we started to get onto the coach, I couldn't help but notice Tony's face, he looked as if someone just stole his favourite toy, but I wasn't going to feel bad.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"I think he's cute," Michelle stated while standing in front of the mirror tarting herself up, "I mean, he's no Tony, but I can see the attraction." She puckered up blowing a kiss into the hotel mirror.

Jal laughed, "Michelle, everything doesn't come down to Tony, plus I think he's funny, I mean he's got us to put up with…"

"Plus he's got big hands, that look very neat," Cassie added brushing her hair, her face bright as I looked to my own reflection.

I signed, "And I am standing right here," I added to the conversation, "I'm happy you all have something nice to say," I took my lipgloss out trying to make as much of the space of the mirror I had to make myself up, other ladies were queuing up to use the ladies room in the intermission.

"Amber, does this mean you're finally going to do it?" Michelle fluffed her hair up, her eyes looking over to me, then Jal's and Cassie's eyes locked onto my reflection.

I shrugged, "I don't think so, not now," I stepped away from the mirror, it was enough that on the couch ride here Tom was over bared with questions, that he was now alone with the boys getting god knows what kind of grief. "I'm not saying he isn't the one, but maybe he could be," I walked out of the ladies room with Michelle, Jal and Cassie behind.

"I think it's nice you're waiting," Jal finally said linking my arm, it felt weird being one of the girls, partly I was used to the boys, "I mean, I didn't, and it was a nightmare…"

"I can't remember my first time, I think it was with a boy, I can't remember…" Cassie said in a daze, her voice always filled with a childlike innocence that stopped everyone in their track.

"Tony was mine," Michelle smiled, "it's strange," she carried on walking with her arm linked with Jal's we slowly making our way back to the seats, "But he's been acting so weird today, is it me, or Tony's being weird?"

"Not just you," Jal sat down in her chair, we had a good place in the theatre, I glanced down to Jal, and my seat was a few rows from Michelle and Jal's. "Maybe it's just you telling him, he can fuck off if he thinks he's getting you again." Jal finished as I put of going to my seat.

"No, he was fine before that," Michelle looked confused, "He…" the lights flashed and bells went to show the show was about it start again. "Never mind," she finished.

Getting back to my seat I could see Tom was already waiting for me, he smiled taking my hand as I looked to him, "You know, I think your friends really care about you, I got another round of questions." He whispered into my ear as I giggled.

"Sorry," I said looking into his eyes, I leaned in kissing him lightly, I felt his hand brushed into my hair holding me, I could feel him kissing me back making my insides swim with excitement.

Tom pulled apart as the lights went down, "Don't be sorry, you're worth it," he squeezed my hand as the second part of the play started, I rested my head on Tom's shoulder feeling my smile started to hurt.

"I didn't get it," Anwar said while we sat in the pub, "I mean, the dude turned into a," he shook his head, "I do not get it." He glanced around the table; he picked up his drink taking a sip.

I glanced to the bar seeing Tom was getting our drinks, "It's ok Anwar," I looked back to the table, we'd managed to get into the small pub, sitting around a small table, I played with the coaster, "You'll forget it in the morning, then remember you've got to write about it for final exam," I now shrugged.

Michelle was returning to the table with drinks, "Ok, I official love Tom," she placed a drink down in front of me, then Jal sitting with her own, "He paid, and said I've not to worry for the rest of the night," she smiled to me, "you don't mind if I steal him?"

"Yes, I would mind Michelle," I got to my feet walking to the bar, I wrapped my arms around his waist, my chin rested on his shoulder, "So, bribing my friends?" I asked softly, he turned around to look into my eyes.

"Not bribing, just, a generous offer," he placed his hand on my face, I looked up into his eyes feeling him lean down to kiss me, I closed my eyes feeling myself relax, it was going to be a good night. "So, go sit down, and I'll bring the drinks back," he added as I playfully saluted him.

"Right boss," I giggled walking back to the table, I kept feeling better as Maxxie elbowed me, and he glanced back to Tom at the bar. "I know," I whispered.

Maxxie wrapped an arm around my shoulder, "If he was on my team, I'd so snatch him up," he sounded happy for me, I knew Maxxie didn't want to say anything too loud, even if he wasn't ashamed of being gay, he didn't scream it from the roof tops either.

I slowly glanced around the table, Cassie and Sid were the only ones missing, it was the fact Sid took her for a meal, it just seemed that everyone was happy and chatty, well all but Tony as he sat in the corner with his beer keeping quiet. "I think I'm happy that you don't steal my boyfriend Maxxie," I felt giddy, "and Michelle, you too," I see Tom placing a drink down in front of Maxxie and Anwar.

"Tony you sure you're ok?" Tom asked, he placed his own beer down, it was weird for me, Tom was being nice, and Tony was being an arsehole. "I can get you another pint later…"

Tony drunk some of his pint, he locked eyes with Tom, "I'm good Tommy," he put on a smug face, and I inhaled.

"I'm going to put some tunes on," I moved from the table, Tom stopping me, I felt him brush his hand into mine; I looked to see the five pound, in pound coins. "I'll put one kings of Leon song on." I laughed, but needed to get away from Tony's toxic attitude.

Flicking through the songs, I could feel him behind me, I didn't turn around, but kept looking to the songs, part of me didn't like how Tony was acting, but I wasn't going to give into his game. "You know, that Tom, he's such a great guy," Tony said while standing still behind me, I kept flicking. "I mean, buying everyone a drink, providing money for music…" he kept his tone dry.

"Tony, I don't know what you're getting at, but it's making you so ugly right now," I found a song pressing the right combination of letters and numbers.

Tony moved next to me, I could see his hand type in another song, "Do you really like that guy?" he asked me in a low whisper, I slowly moved my head to look into his eyes.

"Do you really have to be a jackass to him, when he is trying to be nice to you?" I asked him looking back to the lists of songs again, I couldn't believe Tony at times, "Why don't you go get Michelle drunk, get laid, and leave me alone." I added feeling his hand touch mine.

Tony cleared his throat, I could tell I stumped him, but his hand touched my arm, "Can't you see it, he's playing you." His voice was low.

I felt like laughing, if I was going to I knew it would draw attention to us, "Tony, do you know how stupid you sound," I glanced back to the table, Tom was talking to Maxxie, even Anwar was laughing along, Michelle and Jal listening. "Not all guys are like you Tony, some of them can be nice, and not want in my knickers," I then put in the last songs, a song for Tom as I started to walk away from Tony, leaving him on his own.

* * *

**A/N: **Ello!  
Well I know that this chapter is a little on the short side, but then I just want to show how happy that you are liking what I am writing, plus I am getting tired of Tony in my head telling me he hates Tom, so debating about doing a part of this story from Tony's POV...  
let me know asap ^-^


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: **Yes, this is a chapter from Tony's POV, so I hope you all enjoy it, as I know this took me a while to write how I wanted it to be, plus I think everyone is loving how this is going ^-^

* * *

**Chapter 11**

I sat on the green, the fact I wrapped my coat against the chill, people around starting to over use the colour red. February, typical, for the fact the fourteenth was getting closer. I was feeling like an outsider looking in.

Amber had been with Tom, she'd brought him into our gang, everyone loved Tom, he was so great, Tom is such an ace man.

"Tony, are you taking anyone to the disco the college is putting on?" Michelle asked me, she curled close to me, Sid passing the spliff to me as I took a pull from it, I kept my arm around Michelle, and it was hard for me to really keep the act up. On again off again, that was Michelle and me, the lay I'd know to always be there when I needed her.

I kept my eyes over to Amber, she was catching a skittle that Maxxie was throwing at her, for the fact Tom hadn't gotten here yet, so for now I didn't have to see the sickly display of affection. I looked over Michelle's face; she was smiling at me, and how can anyone be this happy when it was this cold. "I don't know nips…" I replied watching her nose crinkle up, I knew she hated the nickname, made it even more fun to call her it.

"Tony," she playfully shoved me, "Everyone is going," she added to her argument, her eyes focused onto mine, I'd always get pulled into her green eyes, but shaking it off. "Come on, please…" her voice squeaked.

"Fine," I couldn't believe it, but as I felt her kiss me, I didn't hesitate into kissing her back.

"Eww get a room!" Chris joked as I pulled apart from Michelle, I would of said something back, as I glanced to see it wasn't me and Michelle the comment was made at, it was Amber and Tom kissing only a few feet away. I hated it, every time he'd kiss her, I couldn't help but picture them fucking. I'd never know if it was happening, amber wouldn't talk about it, so the only thing I could do, was get it out of him.

"So, Shell, you get Tony to come to the disco of doom?" Amber asked taking the spliff from Maxxie, she inhaled, exhaled the way she did it would always look stylish, part of me hating that I was starting to pick up on the little things Amber did. First off, she was my friend, a friend I'd had since I was in nursery. Now I look at the woman she had turned into, I didn't like seeing another guy touching her.

Michelle leaned forward, "Yes," She cuddled back into my arms, I couldn't focus, I felt her pulling my arm around her, I gave in, part of me watching Tom wrapping his arms around Amber. "So, well…" she glanced over to Chris, "you not got a date?"

"I am going stud!" Chris popping his collar, it was just typical of Chris, he took the spliff from Amber, I kept quiet. "Going to be a girl somewhere, all dolled up, and dumped, I'll be there…"

"Oh Christopher." Amber playfully slapped her cousin, but for the past few weeks, it was like she was a different girl.

"Wow Chris," Cassie smiled, she had been playing with grass, and I kept looking to Sid, who was staring at me again. "Oh, I completely forgot, I got Counselling," Cassie kept her smile, I watched her kiss Sid goodbye walking away.

"Oh, I gotta go dress shopping," Michelle got to her feet, she smiled over to Jal, typical she'd need female friends.

Amber got to her feet, "Oh mind me crashing, I need to get a new dress, mum gave me like eight hundred for a dress," she giggled, her eyes looking down to Tom, he was smiling back making me want to puke my guts up, I needed to know.

"Eight hundred," Jal laughed, "I could spend that much on a dress,"

"Yes, but make sure it's not an ugly arse brown," Michelle said pushing her friend forward, and Amber was laughing kissing Tom goodbye.

"It was green!" Jal snapped, I could feel Michelle's curls tickle my face as she kissed me goodbye. "I hate being the single one," Jal complained as they all walked away.

"Don't worry, your time will come," Amber laughed, I watched as she placed both her hand on Jal's shoulders, I hated seeing her so happy. Long run yes, she'd been happy before, but that was before Tom came into her life, now all my plans were up to shit as he kept watching her with his eyes, his eyes that would have Amber look deep into.

What the fuck was wrong with me, all I wanted to do was take her virginity, claim something that no one else had, now I was glaring at her boyfriend, getting sick when ever I'd see them together. It was seriously fucked up. "Tony!" Sid's voice snapped at me, I blinked seeing that Tom had gone, it was Sid and me sitting, Maxxie even looking concern for me. "What's your problem with Tom?"

"Yeah man, you're act like a complete douche," Chris lit up another spliff, he kept his eyes on me, and I knew that it wasn't their fault. "Unless there is something we should know?" his eyes stared mine down, a part of me knew that with Chris and Amber's well being he'd do anything to look after her.

I kept trying to think of something, anything, "He's a cherry hound!" I blurted out, I didn't really know how anyone was going to react to it, it was like every ones face said something different.

Maxxie, he was looking worried, as he should of picked it up, his puppy brown eyes kept trying to work something out. Anwar puzzled, it was easy enough to know that most things would confuse him; it was Anwar who always was the last to catch on. Then Chris, he glared, it was hard for me to keep my eyes away from Chris as he inhaled the smoke of his spliff, he handed it Sid, who next to me trying to keep staring at me, his face was blank, it was like he was working something out in his head. "I'm going to fucking kill him!" Chris jumped up; it was the look on his face, and the fact I knew he wasn't taking this lightly. "I'm going to…" he clicked to Anwar.

"Beat the shit out of him?" Anwar wasn't sure what was going on.

Chris clicked, "Yeah, beat the shit…" he started to march in one direction, the changed and went in another.

"Chris!" Maxxie glanced back to me; he knew this wasn't good, "Tony, you better not be making drama!" Maxxie looked pissed as he ran after Chris, as of that Anwar got to his feet.

"Where the queen goes," he started to run after Maxxie now, and I sat there with Sid still staring at me with that blank stare.

I finally got up, Sid flicked the cherry off the spliff starting to follow me, "Tony, what is wrong with you?" Sid's voice hit me, I kept walking away, I knew that one person could see right through me, it was him. "Oi!" Sid grabbed my arm forcing me to look into his eyes, I felt myself avoiding his stare. "Tony, are you sick, Amber is a smart girl." I pulled my arm away from him.

"Oh come in Sid, really, he's been following her around, making nice, buying her stuff, and being all over her, he wants to fuck her, and he'll dump her." I stormed away, but it was Sid he wasn't going to quit.

"Tony, are you fucking mental!" Sid called after me, he was jogging to keep up with my fast pace walk, I didn't look back, "Tony!"

"What Sidney!" I snapped looking to him, he'd stopped dead in his track, "I mean, how do you know he's not after one thing?"

"Not all us guys are like you Tony, we don't buy gifts, hang around with her friends, and pay attention because we want a shag, we do it because we care." His voice stung, I couldn't believe he was standing up to me. "Some of us are happy that Amber found a decent bloke, and you could be a decent friend and let her be happy."

"Maybe I am being a good friend Sid, she's blind and he is using the oldest game, he doesn't care…"

Sid rolled his eyes; he kept looking at me with those judgement eyes, "He's not like that Tony you are, and don't think I hadn't notice you trying to get into Amber's knickers, how she knows you Tony, she won't let you touch her with a barge pole, so you try and make sure no one else can be with her!" again the words hit me hard.

"No Sid, I am looking out for her."

"Tony," Sid snapped over me, "Are you in love with her or something?" the question caught me completely off guard, my eyes focused dead on his, I couldn't think, or say anything, and now Sid was stepping closer to me, his eyes staring mine down. "Don't be a wank stain Tony, just let her be happy, you are not going to have her, she doesn't want you like that Tony." He shook his head; I knew for that moment, I had showed too much with my eyes. "You're a wanker Tony…" now turning around he walk away leaving me alone.

"Tony, oh, Tony…" Michelle came, I felt her body tighten, relax, it was easy enough to please her, it was hearing her cry my name over and over, her hands pulling me in tighter. "Oh God!" her voice cried into my ear, I felt myself come, it was the moment, but I didn't make much a noise, I just rolled off her looking to my ceiling, I kept looking to the light bulb, and now feeling Michelle cuddling close to me. "Tony, I love you…"

"Yeah, you too nips." I smirked, I wasn't meant to say that, but it was what I could come out with while she sat up, I knew the drama fit.

Her eyes focused on mine, "Tony, do you have to call me that?" she folded her arms holding the blanket over her tits, and I kept smirking to her. "Tony…"

"What, you know you love it," I kissed her, she didn't kiss back, but I looked over her face, "I'm joking Michelle…" I brushed her cheek, the sex was good, but it didn't distract me from what I wanted to forget.

"Oh, ok," Michelle kissed me, "I've gotta go, the disco is tomorrow, and I've got so much to do, but you're picking me up right, I mean, I don't want to catch the bus," she then smiled, "I completely forgot, Amber hired a limo, she asked if we wanted to join the limo party…"

"Yeah what ever," I moved off the bed finding my boxers, I pulled them on looking back to Michelle, "Limo party sounds fun."

Michelle started to put her bra on; she glanced over me finding her knickers, "Tony, have you and Amber fallen out?" she asked, simple question, I should say, no Nips, we're find.

I didn't, I just shrugged finding my jeans putting them on, and I could see them eyes, it was like Sid with tits. "What?" I snapped.

"Nothing, just lately, you've been a real, well," she pulled her top on after her skirt, "Tony, what is up with you lately?"

"You better get home, last bus is soon," Dodge and avoid, that was me, I couldn't believe what I was doing, Sid really got to me, and now Michelle was pulling her boots on, she turned to look at me.

"I don't get you Tony," her last words slamming my bedroom door, I flopped onto my desk, moving the mouse of my pc seeing the desktop picture, the gang, it was a old photo, and I kept looking from Me, then I see Amber sitting beside me, she had her old hair colour, it was weird seeing her long hair, before the bleaching, crazy layers, she had her arm around me, smiling that smile that was contagious.

I logged onto Myspace, I felt my eyes going to Amber's profile, I wasn't one to stalk a profile, but I hated seeing that little thing that didn't say single anymore, it was set, 'in a relationship' I see her display picture changed from her and Maxxie in the same outfit, to herself kissing tom's cheek, it made me feel horrible inside.

I click on the photo album, friends, and here I was flicking through nights out, days at college. Then there was the photo, she was holding me, arm around her, I can see that smile, her face pressed against mine, both of us out of our faces, but smiling at the person taking the photo, I didn't know how I was going to have moments like that again.

Then it hit me, was Sid right? Was I falling for Amber?

I couldn't believe it, I'd spent so long trying to get her virginity, did I really miss it, I was falling in love with the girl who I'd never thought I was, but now I was loosing her to Tom. I needed a plan, anything. I wasn't going to let him take her, not now or ever.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

"Wow Ber," Cassie watched me enter my bedroom wearing my dress. I'd spent so long picking it out, I wanted it to be sexy, but not showing too much skin, I needed to not to be red, red was going to be everywhere, and I wanted to stand out. I'd picked the colour blue, it was baby blue that shimmered, the corseted top made my boobs pop in the right way, the skirt part floated out, it reminded me of a costume I wore trick or treating as a child, well that dress had a mermaid tail attached, I kept looking in the mirror felling oddly girlie. "Like serious wow."

I'd made sure my hair was pinned up perfect, make up made me have a classic pin up girl look, my hands brushed down my stomach, "I feel like tonight's the night…" I glanced as Cassie put on her dress, we decided to get ready together, Maxxie would come to my flat, and then we'd go to Tom and Sid to be pick up first, before Tony and Michelle with Jal. I couldn't believe I spent most of last night listening to Michelle complain about Tony's odd behaviour. It was like the last month all I was getting from people was how Tony was acting.

Why was everyone telling me about Tony, I didn't care, not since the trip to London, I couldn't believe that out of everyone, he was the one not liking Tom. Maybe it was because he was the new guy, people paying attention to me and him, and not him and Michelle. I shook my head finally focused back on my reflection as Cassie stood beside me in her dress. She wore a simple white dress, it made her tiny frame look smaller, her slip on white ballet flat with her hair curled, make up making her seem like a new age Marilyn Monroe. "How you going to do it?" Cassie asked me placing a hand on my shoulder as we both looked into my full-length mirror.

"Well I was hoping he'd put his penis into my vagina, and it go in and out, maybe some good foreplay before had, condoms, lots of protection," I giggled feeling Cassie laugh too.

"No, where? When?" she asked, she turned picking up my camera, "Smile," she snapped the photo before I had a chance to do anything, I blinked trying to return my sight.

Cassie looked to the photo, "wow, you look like a fairy," she handed me the Camera before striking a pose, and I snapped the photo.

"I don't know, I thought we'd come here, or I'll go to his place after the dance," I played with my hands, I stood beside Cassie, I pointed the camera as we both pulled a funny face snapping the photo. "I've never done this before," I added placing the camera into my clutch purse, I was so nervous about tonight, but I knew that if felt right, I was finally going to lose my virginity to the guy that won over my heart.

"It's ok," Cassie pulled me into a hug, I felt myself smile, I had spent so long being friends with Cassie, I felt good about confiding in her. "It's a good thing you're not doing it with Tony," she sounded confident, "I mean he doesn't have the right to spread lies about Tom…"

"What you mean spread lies?" I felt weird as Cassie turned around looking worried. "Cassie, tell me."

"Well it's Sid, last night, he told me, that Tony was saying to everyone that Tom was a cherry hound, and that Tom's only after one thing, so Chris went a little mad…" her voice trailed off, I turned to look to my phone, I slipped it into my purse with my camera.

"I can't believe it!" I snapped the purse close, I could feel my pulse burning under my skin, "I just…"

Cassie rushed to my side, "Don't worry, Sid told him off, he said to Tony to be a good friend, and leave you alone…" her voice calming, I went to open my mouth, but the sound of the buzzer caught me.

I got to the intercom, I pressed the button slowly, "Hey Ber, Limo's here…" Maxxie sounded excited, and I knew that for now, I was going to put on my happy face, I wasn't going to let Tony get to me, and I was going to enjoy tonight, remember it and forget I'd ever consider Tony Stonem my friend.

The limo stopped the last time, I sat with Tom looking him over in his suit, he kissed my cheek with a smile, "you look so beautiful," he whispered softly into my ear, I broke into a light blush break over my cheek.

Sid was sitting with Cassie; it was stranger seeing him without his trademark beanie hat on, and his hair washed and clean. "You're hansom tonight," I kissed him, I didn't want to remember what me and Cassie talked about. He kissed me back as I relaxed letting the kiss get deeper.

"Wow, starting the party," Michelle giggled getting into the limo; Jal was behind her as I couldn't see anyone else with them. "Tony's not with us, I dumped him again," Michelle, answered my question before I could ask it. "He's being such a tosser." Her voice didn't sound hurt about the break up, I knew that it was something that happened once a month.

"Are you ok?" Tom asked, he sounded concern, he wasn't used to the Michelle Tony make up break up show, so I let him worry for Michelle.

Michelle sat down, Sid passed her a champagne glass, "I'm fine Tom, just sick of feeling used," she glanced to me, and the face, Sid had given me the look when he'd gotten into the limo, now Michelle was.

"Well lets get this party started," I popped open the champagne out the window before the limo started to drive again, I told the drive to take his time getting us to the college. I kept smiling pouring the bubbling drink into glasses, and I kept that smile.

Michelle raised her glass, "A night to remember!" she held the glass high, and everyone followed her suit, we said the same, and drunk up our glasses, even refilling the glasses. I took my camera out snapping photos, passing the camera round so everyone could take their own photo, and I felt better about Tony not being here, I was so over his moods and even happier that with Tony being dumped he'd not turn up at the dance at all.

Pulling into the car park of the college, I watched as everyone got out of the limo, I glanced over Michelle's black dress, as simple as it was, it was the fact she'd always look 'shaggable' Jal on the other hand was wearing a purple dress I'd pick out for her, it flattered her curves, and made her look amazing.

I felt Tom wrap his arm around me, we all walked into the hall together, the place, as predicted to be over the top with heart and red and black streamers, I kept looking to the floating cupids, and my eyes going to Tom as he kept laughing at the décor of the gym. Music was the corny kind that no one would admit to liking, but it was a laugh to dance to. I glanced around to see that Chris was standing in a weird suit, it was the kind where a tux was drawn onto a t-shirt and his black jeans had the t-shirt tucked in. I could tell from where I stood that he was poring vodka into the punch, and wouldn't be the only one, who knew, but the end of the night it would be a evil concoction of every kind of alcohol in it. "Would you like a drink?" Tom asked me with a smile.

"Please," I felt him kiss me, and he glanced as him and Sid walked over to the punch bowl, I could see him stopping, and then I felt my stomach sink, Chris was talking to him, but what I could hear from here it didn't seem like talking.

Sid now stood between Tom, then staring at Chris, "Tony is full of shit Chris," Sid shouted, and I rolled my eyes looking away.

Jal inhaled, "What did Tony do this time?"

"He said that Tom was a cherry hound," Cassie answered Jal's question and I closed my eyes.

I opened them looking to the girls, plus Maxxie, he gave an awkward smile, "So, who wants to dance?" he wanted to change the subject, he reached out taking my hand pulling me to the dance floor as Good Charlotte's Girls and Boys come on.

I laughed grabbing Cassie's hand, who grabbed Michelle, finally taking Jal's hand as we all stood on the dance floor among our college classmates.

It wasn't long before the songs we suggested came, on, Chris and Tom was not going to fight; Sid dancing with Cassie was now my personal hero. I was dancing with Michelle and Jal as Tom wasn't much of a dancer, but Maxxie was getting him to move with Chris and Anwar.

"Wanna spliff?" Chris whispered to the group, I couldn't help but grin, I glanced over to Michelle and Jal, Jal shook her head to say no, Michelle did too.

"I'm up for it," Tom said feeling excited, it was still new to him, but then he was so funny when stoned, he was a lightweight when it came to the spliff that Chris supplied. "Come on Berie," he used the pet name he'd made for me.

I nodded, as me; Sid, Cassie, Tom, Anwar and Chris went to the bike shed. I felt Tom putting his blazer on me to stop me getting cold, I took the smell of his aftershave in, I could feel him wrapping his arms around me as Chris sparked up.

"I'm sorry mate, about this mix up," Chris inhaled, exhaled, then repeated handing the spliff to Sid to his right, "I just get a little protective to Amber, she's my baby sister really."

"Christopher, I'm three months older than you!" I snapped taking the spliff from Sid, I kept my eyes a playful glare, and Chris laughed.

"Yeah, but you're shorter than me, so still little," he joked while sparking up another spliff to pass the other way, Anwar taking it hungrily, I kept giggling now.

Tom took the spliff from my mouth, I kissed him after exhaling, he brushed his hand down my waist, but glanced to Chris, "It's ok, if I was a cherry hound, I would of pissed off right now," he didn't sound bothered by Tony's rumour, I watched as everyone passed the spliffs around.

I took one off of Sid again, this time looking to Sid, "What made him do it?" I asked feeling the need to know more, and he just shrugged.

"I don't know, he's being Tony," he hugged Cassie close to him, she was careful with the spliff, and Sid sighed, "Cassie, I won't let you over eat," he said like a routine, thing was with Cassie, we all knew she was still having problems with eating, but she smiled taking a pull from the spliff.

I giggle, "Well I am pretty sure he was just trying to be an arse wipe," I then held my stomach, "Crap," I laughed louder. "I'll see you inside, I gotta take a wicked wiz and I am going to take forever to get this dress up," I added looking to Tom, "Don't worry, you can look forward to that later…" I wiggled my eyebrow before walking away feeling good about myself for once.

My hands took forever to dry under the crappy hand drier, I felt myself getting impatient as I finally wiped the finally bit of wetness onto the arse of my dress then down my thighs. I glanced into the mirror feeling my smile was making me feel excited, I glanced down to my dress knowing I put on the sexiest knickers on, I knew that I wasn't going to regret it, the condoms in my clutch purse were flavoured as well as ribbed and extra safe. I opened the rest room door seeing him.

"Tony!" I snapped looking into his eyes, he was wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans, his hair was messed up, and I could see he'd been waiting for me. "I don't want to talk to you…" I added stepping away from him, only a few more feet and I was back at the dance, but I felt Tony's hand catching my arm.

He pulled me to face him, I could feel my heart pounding, it felt wrong to be alone with him, and I needed anyone to come and see me, take me back to Tom. "I just want to tell you my side." He spoke softly, he kept his eyes on mine, the blue would always catch me off guard, and I should be storming away, calling him every name I could think of. "Please, I ask for two minutes."  
"Fine, two minutes starting now," I glanced to the clock on the wall behind him, I knew that if I was gone too long someone would come looking for me, or so I'd hoped.

Tony moved us from the centre of the hallway, he touched my arm as I moved it away from him, my arms crossed my chest keeping my eyes fixed, dead, and I wasn't being charmed. "Amber, I don't like Tom," he started.

I laughed, "Ok, I don't want to hear anymore," I turned to walk away feeling him pull me back to face him.

Tony's eyes looked desperate, "Why do I have to like him, he just randomly comes into your life, and you act like he's the most trustworthy person on the planet, you don't know him!"

I pressed my hand against my temple, my eyes avoided his, "Tony, I don't trust you, and I may not look it, but I can judge people myself," I now turned to walk away, "I thought you was my friend," I turned to say to his face, I kept serious, "but that's it, you're Tony fucking everything with a vag Stonem," my hand wave in the air, "So I trust him a lot more than I can trust you!" I turned to walk towards the door, my hands pushing it open.

"I love you Amber!" Tony called after me, I paused on pushing, I felt my chest tighten as I swallowed hard, my face twisting. I turned back to see him standing there, I quickly walked to him, I didn't care that I was in heels, I didn't care I felt I was going to trip on my dress, but I got to Tony.

My face inches from his, I brought my hand up feeling it crash across Tony's cheek, I put everything I had behind the slap, my eyes blinking back tears, I wanted to cry out of pure frustration. "Fuck you Tony," I said in his face, he looked completely shocked that I would slap him, but I didn't know what he was expecting to happen from this. "How dare you say this to me, how fucking DARE YOU!" I felt my fist now hitting him, I punched and slapped him, I turned to run, I ran from Tony, I wished I'd done more but for now I was pissed off, I wanted to find Tom, I felt like tonight was completely ruined.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N:** Right, this chapter has been in my head from the moment I started this fan fiction, I just have to add that It's been strange for me to write chapters out so fast, but I hope that you've enjoyed the chapter...  
Songs that inspired me for the relationship between Tony and Amber...  
Once - by Diana Vickers  
How to touch a girl - Jojo  
The way I loved you - Taylor Swift  
The only exception - paramore  
Run - Snow patrol  
Chasing cars - Snow patrol  
Set fire to the third bar - Yup Snow patrol...  
Have fun reading this chapter, as I had so much fun typing it...

* * *

**Chapter 13**

No one suspected that I'd been crying, I'd cleaned myself up, shook off the bad feeling, and I was in the arms of Tom, we slow danced to JoJo how to touch a girl, I could feel the lyrics, the way Tom held me in his arms, my head rested perfect on his chest, we didn't move much to the music as I kept my eyes closed. I wanted to be here, I wanted to be with Tom. But no matter how much I tried to push Tony's words out of my head, it would work. My hands touched Tom's back, my eyes closed feeling myself breathing in and out, my heart was beating slowly, I felt each pound of my heart, my stomach had knotted up so much that I felt my eyes slowly open seeing Tony, he stood outside the doors looking in, my eyes meet his, but I didn't look long.

"You alright?" Tom asked while looking down to my face, I kept a smile, this smile was hard to keep myself happy, I had to fake it, I didn't want to upset Tom, no I wasn't going to ruin a real thing because of Tony, not now or ever.

I couldn't believe my smile was fooling him, "You said your house is empty tonight," I said pulled my face closer to his, I wanted to keep to my promise.

Tom smiled brighter, he touched his hands to my waist, he leaned down kissing me, I kissed back, but this feeling made my feel physically sick. "Yeah, all empty," Tom kept looking into my eyes, his hand played over my cheek, he was being gentle, and he was being a gentleman. "Do you want to come back to mine?" he asked slowly, I could feel that he was nervous, and it was sweet.

I took his hand, I didn't answer the question slowly walking with him to the exit, and I'd picked up my clutch bag from the table, mostly ignoring the stares from many people. I didn't speak, not until I got out the door, the air was chilly, the night sky was without a cloud, and then I turned to smile at Tom. "How we getting to your place soon?"

I couldn't believe my voice, I could see the excitement was finally hitting him; he quickly took out his mobile, "Hello, can I get a cab from Roundview College to twenty four saint Paul's street?" he kept grinning, I glanced away reaching into my clutch purse taking out a spliff lighting it up, I needed the edge, I needed to relax as Tom finished off his phone call. "Ten minutes, that's great, yes cab for Tomas," he hung up the phone joining me.

I inhaled the smoke, exhaling smiling up to Tom, "So, Ten minutes…" I kept grinning, if I made it through tonight, I can prove to myself that Tony wasn't going to win, he wasn't going to get to me, I had one up on him, I wasn't going to let him win. "Too long," I exhaled smoke passing the spliff to Tom.

The cab didn't take long at all, "Tomas!" the man yelled, I put what was left of the spliff out, I kicked it away feeling like I was more nervous than before. I felt Tom's hand hold mine, it was making me get a feeling that maybe this wasn't right, but I couldn't stop getting into the cab, I slid over as Tom sat next to me, he touched my face, "you ok?"

"Saint Paul's street?" the cab driver asked, my attention snapped to reality.

Tom broke into a grin, "Yeah, twenty four," I could feel his hand squeezing mine, the cab was moving forward as I closed my eyes, I felt the spliffs effect on me, my stomach wasn't so tense, but Tom pulled me into his arms kissing me, I relaxed into his arms, my hands brushing around his back kissing him back, I needed this, I'd waited too long, before feeling his hand brush up my thigh, I kept my eyes tight getting into the kiss.

I'd not noticed the number on his door, the colour, I'd never been to Tom's house before now, I'd felt him pushing me into the wall, the kiss out of any control, my hand forcing his shirt open, I kept kissing, I kept my eyes closed, my mind turned off. I couldn't think, if I thought about anything I would know what I was doing didn't make sense.

I made the stairs, Tom kisses moved to my neck, my hands moving for his belt, his bed was soft as we fell onto it, I kept feeling his hands trying to find the clasp for the dress, I kept taking deep breathes. I looked into Tom's eyes, the deep mix of brown and green; he kept smiling up at me.

Then he was gone beneath the layers of my skirt, I couldn't breathe as the light kisses started at my knee. He kissed, lightly running his tongue up my inner thigh, his hands helped to guide my French knickers to one side lightly running his tongue over me, I gasped, my hands holding onto the bed, it felt good, but something was missing. I kept quiet feeling myself getting more awkward.

Tom's head popped back; he looked to me, "Amber, are you ok?" he looked seriously worried, I felt stupid.

I laughed, "Yeah, just," I pulled him on my, I rolled so he was laying on the bed, I saddle on him, maybe if I did something, I kissed down his open shirt, feeling his skin under my lips, I lightly licked across his collar bone, down his chest, my hand got to his belt, the awkward feeling didn't seem to go away. Tom's hand touched my face, "I'm fine," I didn't mean to snap, my hands were shaking, I bit onto my lip. "I just need some air," I grabbed my clutch bag, Tom got up looking worried. "Just need to take a walk," I held my hand up, "I'll come back," quickly I ran out the room, I stopped at the door looking back to the stairs.

The door was open in seconds as I closed it behind me, the cold air chill, biting at me as I walked down the garden path not looking back to the house, I felt embarrassed.

I didn't really know where I was walking, I felt like everything was spinning out of control, this morning, I woke up and felt that everything was going to plan, Tom was perfect, he was loved by my mother, my friends found him a laugh. Michelle, Jal, jealous. I felt my hands pulling the pins out of my hair letting it fall down, I brushed it out, feeling my stomach sink, I kept walking knowing I was only a few streets away from my flat, but I turned the other way, a park was gonna be on the next road, as I see the gate locked, I walked to the hole that I'd help make with Chris, Tony and Sid, I bit my lip squeezing through the gap seeing the swing set.

I sat down placing my clutch bag on the floor by my feet; I started to swing lightly closing my eyes.

"Fuck," I muttered, I wanted to not be like this, he was Tony Stonem. He was the guy who made fucking awful joked, he couldn't catch to save his life. I knew that when he broke another girls heart, I told myself I'd never be that girl. I couldn't stand his taste in fast food; I hated how he'd make a funny face when I wanted a serious answer to a question. I hated every time I'd need him, he'd be fucking about when who ever he wanted.

I kept swinging, I loved how Tom would cuddle close to me, and he'd never talk to me when my favourite TV shows were on. Tom would kiss me when I wasn't expecting it. I loved how he'd give me a random gift to cheer me; I loved how he'd get alone with my crazy parents. I loved how he waited for me.

Then it hit me, and I bit my lip getting to my feet walking without direction, I knew where I had to go know, I inhaled and exhaled as I lit up the last of my spliffs, I kept walking.

It didn't take me too long to get where I wanted to be, I flipped my phone open, then typed in a message, _Can you let me in?_

I'd sat on my bed, I felt like a complete idiot, "I love you Amber," I muttered to myself banging my head on the wall, I couldn't believe I said it, and expected her to say it back, no, I get a beating.

"You know you're an idiot right," Her voice smooth, I glanced to the bedroom door avoiding to look at my sister. Effy moved into the room, "You went to the dance, told her you loved her Tony." Effy glanced over me, her eyes like mine, she kept laughing, "you're a total idiot…"

"Thanks Eff, thanks for letting me know I am a complete idiot," I waved my sister a salute, her hand played on the bed, her eyes going over to my computer. "What else is there to say?"

Effy got to her feet, she brushed her hand into her hair, she shrugged, "So what happened after you told her?"

"Well for one, she slapped me, then she punched me, slapped me and said fuck you," I waved my hands, "I told her I loved her Effy!" I looked scared for the first time, and I could keep playing in my head, Amber and Tom getting in the cab, driving back to his place.

Effy bit her lip, she watched me, then shrugged again, "Guess she beat your game Tony…" she headed to the door, "You're just going to have to admit defeat." She tapped the door, her footsteps stopped at her door, I heard it open then shut, and I was alone again.

I moved over to my computer again, I slowly logged onto Myspace, I clicked onto Amber's photo album again, I found I was turning into that guy, the one who was a complete dick, and when I finally learn I was in love, she wouldn't trust me, and so goes and fucks another guy. A complete loser, I closed my eyes. No I was the loser, the complete wank stain. I glanced over the video clips uploaded to her page. I see a title, _Tony and me init mate…_ I pressed the play looking to the video…

"I am the fucking shit, oh fucking yeah…" Amber sung, I was holding the camera as she was wearing jogging bottoms and a white vest, her brown hair was tied into a high ponytail, she was dancing, she was holding a bottle of strongbow, and in the other hand was a crappy rolled spliff, "Oh, Oh Tony take it over…" she rushed towards the camera, then I saw me, I cringed at my hair cut, it was longer in curtains.

"Amber and Tony, we're running it bitch, we're gonna get ya, we're gonna make you scream…" I laughed listening to myself.

Amber looked to me, she placed the bottle to my mouth I drunk, and she inhaled some of the spliff. "I'm mother fucking Amber of the mother fucking miles, you think you suckers can have me, I'm gonna mother fucking kick yo UH!" her voice was hard to hear over my laughing. I took the spliff from her.

"Tony Stonem, mother of a mic, can't even rap, let alone rhyme, but I'm with Amber, she's a fucking MC, mess with her, bitch better mess with me." I broke into a fit hearing my own voice, but there was more.

"Tony's my bitch, my bro till the end, man gotta love him, his my fucking man," she then burst into giggles. "Tony, I think I'm wasted…" she moved away from me, I could only see her.

"Ber, you know you're fucking awesome," I said while she danced to nothing.

Amber walked to the camera blowing a kiss, she then giggled, "You are my best mate Tony, I fucking love you mate!" she then giggled as the video cut off.

I see the video stopped, I brushed my hand over the keyboard, the mouse in my other hand, I scrolled down to the comment I left, _Ber, you're a bitch for uploading this, God I look like such a tosser, take it down bitch!_

Then I see she'd written, I felt my stomach turn, _Bitch please, you know you love me, and this is some fucking awesome mcing…_

I kept looking to the screen, then I see my phone dance across the table, I looked at it quickly, I couldn't believe it, but I rushed out my room, down the stairs two at time, before throwing myself at the front door. I opened it to see Amber standing there, purse in one hand, spliff in the other as she put it out on the wall, "I think we need to talk…" her voice cold, her eyes focused on mine.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

I'd walked into Tony's room a hundred times before now, every time I'd never felt this way, my hand clenching my purse throwing on his bed, I felt complete and totally angry. "How fucking Dare you!" I snapped turning to see Tony closing his bedroom door, the tears were behind my eyes, I wanted to beat his arse down, but I kept it to myself. "I hope you're happy, fucking ecstatic!" I kept staring at him.

He stood there, for the first time Tony didn't have a witty remark, a joke, anything to show how smug he was, but he stared into my eyes, "I'm not happy," he folded his arms across his chest, he kept watching me.

I pulled my hands into my hair, I couldn't look at him, I didn't want to, "I planned everything Tony!" I felt my hands let my hair go, "I have the perfect boyfriend, and the perfect setting, everything I ever wanted." I spun to see he'd not moved an inch. "I was in his bed Tony, on, his bed, he was," I lifted my hand, "I had everything, I was ready, I wanted to fuck him Tony!" I kept my eyes dead on his, "Then you come and tell me," I made air quotes, "You 'love' me…" I laughed, I laughed because it was easier to laugh, "I was in that moment I'd imagined for the past month, and I felt wrong," I brushed my hand over my face.

"Amber," Tony's voice was soft, he'd moved closer to me, I could feel his hand touching my exposed shoulder, I felt my stomach clench with the feeling of him being so close.

I stepped away from him, my eyes snapped, "Don't touch me Tony," I kept him at arms length keeping myself under as much control as I could muster at the point in time. "You win," I then felt my emotions were drained, I'd given up, "I hope you're happy, cos tonight you stop me doing the one thing I've waited so badly." I bit into my lip feeling if I didn't it would quiver away from me.

Tony didn't move, he stood in front of me, I felt him, but he didn't touch me again, I stood completely still, I couldn't look up to him, I couldn't think of anything to do apart from stand at the end of Tony's bed, the sound of the night was the only thing that could be heard. "Amber," he'd whispered my name so softly, I couldn't bring myself to look at him. I leaned down picking up my purse, "Amber, don't go…" he called for me as I walked to the bedroom door, I glanced back into the room, looking to his eyes. "Please…"

"I'm sorry Tony, I can't do this anymore," I shrugged, "I really wanted you to be my friend, but I can't be friends with someone who," I shrugged, "I can't be friends with you Tony, not now, not ever." I closed his bedroom door behind me; I walked into the hall seeing Effy standing looking at me, "Hey Eff…"

"Hey, you know, if it makes you feel better," she started blowing a smoke ring from a spliff handing it to me, I reached out taking it taking a pull handing it back, "He did mean it," she said as I turned to walk away.

"Too little too late Effy," I walked down the stairs, I didn't want to think, if I thought anything would make my stomach twist into something I could imagine, my eyes finally let the tears fall, I took out my phone seeing the missed calls from Tom, I turned my phone off now making the walk home, I just wanted to get out of this stupid dress and sleep.

I opened my eyes the next morning, or was it afternoon, I glanced to the alarm clock to see it was just ten passed eleven. I could see my dress piled on the floor, I see my make up from the night all over my white pillow case, I closed my eyes again feeling sick, my head hurt from the crying, my stomach clenched from the hollow that wasn't going to be filled no matter how much I'd avoided to eat anything. I reached over for my clutch bag, I opened it to see I'd not turned my phone back on, I hovered my finger over the power button, then placed it back down on my bed, I didn't even know how I was going to explain myself to Tom.

It took another twenty minutes for me to get the strength to get out of bed, I'd pulled on a nightgown, I slipped out of last night's French knickers, I walked to the bathroom, it took me a while to get under the water, I stood under the warm running water resting my forehead again the wall, I couldn't think of anything, all I could see is Tony's face when I told him I didn't want to be friends with him anymore. I could see it hurt him, it hurt me, I couldn't imagine how my life had gotten to this, but as I felt the water hitting me, I just reached for my shampoo, cleaning, I needed to clean myself and hopefully it would clear my mind of the clutter.

Stopping the water, I couldn't hear anything in the flat as I wrapped a towel around myself, I'd looked into Gina's room, empty, the whole flat was empty as it made me feel better about having time to think.

Getting dried, I put on a pair of jogging bottoms, the ones I'd not worn in years, pulling on a pink and white stripped vest, I pulled my hair into a messy high ponytail, walking into the kitchen finally turning my phone on for the first time since last night.

I could see I'd gotten a few voicemails; I put the phone to my ear. _First message received at twelve twenty four am _"Amber, where are you, I'm worried, I phoned your house and no one is there, please call me." Tom's voice was so worried, I bit onto my lip. _Second message received at one oh five am _" Amber, look I didn't mean to pressure you, I should of waited, please don't be mad at me, it's that fucking Tony's got into your head isn't it?" the beep made me hold onto the table, and I wanted to cry all over again.

_Third message received at two forty five am _"Hey, look Amber, I don't want you to stop being my friend, you're the only girl I've not completely fuck it up with, well guess I have now. Amber please forgive me, I don't care, fuck Tom, fuck anyone you want, just please talk to me, please…." The sound of Tony's voice made my stomach sink again, I wished for everything that I could of turned back time, but as the fact I didn't have a TARDIS or a time travelling Doctor, I knew I was screwed.

I deleted all the messaged, I glanced to my phone book, I pressed call listening the phone ring. "Amber, thank god, are you ok?" Tom's voice was relief, I could imagine him smiling as I'd finally called him back. "Amber…"

"Yeah, I'm fine, too much spliff, fucked with my head, I came home and passed out," I tried to make my voice sound as calm as possible, I knew that he'd believe me, why wouldn't he believe me.

I heard him sigh, "I'm sorry, I didn't want to push you Berie, I wanted to be perfect for you," he sounded happy, was he so happy I'd called him back, "Do you want to come over?" he asked me as I kept staring at the clock in my kitchen.

"No, how about you come here," I said feeling myself turning to the living room walking into the hall, to the room that I'd have to think of something, "We can sort this out," I added trying to not sound as if anything bad would happen.

I felt a paused, "Yeah, I'll be on my way, see you soon." His end went dead as I calmly placed my phone down, I sat on the sofa I'd woken up new years day, I remembered that party, it was the party that made me get grounded, the day after, everything felt as if it was years ago, not just over two months.

When the buzzer went, I'd placed down the cup of coffee I'd made myself, well one of the four I'd drunk, only thing I could make stick. I walked to the intercom pressing the button, "Hello…" I whispered.

"Berie," Tom's voice made my insides swim, when the simple nick name used to make me feel warm, happy, now it just filled my with worry, I pressed the enter button without anything to say to him.  
"Hey," I said opening the door to Tom, he pulled me into his arms, and I could feel him holding on tight as he leaned back kissing me quickly.

Tom's eyes looked into mine, "Are sure you're ok?" he brushed my bangs out of my face, he looked into my eyes, and I couldn't look directly back, "Amber…"

"Tom I'm fine," I then sighed, "I just was," I leaned up pulling his face to mine, I kissed him hard, I felt him kissing me back, I felt my back hit the wall, he was pushing against me, I run my hands up his back feeling me being lifted to wrap my legs around he, the kissed was rough, it was everything a kiss should be, but I could stop feeling empty.

I felt my back hitting my bed, the kisses moving down my neck, my hands moving up his shirt, he looked into my eyes, "I love you Amber…" his words were soft, I caught his eyes looking into them warm loving hazel eyes, and my stomach turned over. "I love you." He repeated again while I lay there staring up at him completely blank. "This is the part you say it too Amber…" he looked confused.

"I…" I felt my voice tighten, "I," I felt his weight move off me, I could see him sitting on the bed looking to my wall of shamed, the photos that no one wanted to remember, "I," I couldn't believe it, all this time.

Tom got up, he walked out of my bedroom, and I couldn't hear the front door so I knew he didn't leave the flat. I'd sat there looking to my wall of shame, the photos of all my friends, everyone of them looking back at me, even the fact I'd sat on my bed listening to the silence.

It took me a while to get off my bed, I walked to the living room to see Tom sitting there on the sofa, his hands in his hair, he glanced up to me, "Three words, Amber," he then stood up, "I. Love. You." He broke them down as a person who didn't understand English could try and understand. "I do love you Amber," he stated while his face looked blank, "And you just left me hanging…"

I kept still, "Tom, it's,"

"Tony," he nodded, "you know, it's funny, I spent most of us, telling myself that he was a douche bag, how can she be friends with such a self-centred dick!" his eyes focused on mine. "But you picked me, you wanted to be with me, and I fell in love with you Amber, thinking you was feeling it too." He brushed a hand over my face, "so, say it Amber, tell me, you love me…" his voice pleading, I couldn't believe it.

"I don't," I avoided his eyes now, "I don't love you Tom," I felt my stomach finally drop; it was completely numb as I felt his hand leave my face. "I'm so, so sorry…" I felt a tear fall from my cheek; it took me a while to look up again.

Tom looked as if I'd slapped him, he kept staring at me in complete shock, "You love him, don't you?" he said slowly.

"No, No," I waved my hand, "Tony has nothing to do with this," I said mostly I knew it was a lie, I was telling myself this to stop myself hurting him more than I already had. "Please, just understand I need time…"

"Time Amber, you don't have it," Tom looked mad, I felt him glaring, "I gave you time, I was nice, I did everything to win you, but how can I win someone who isn't there, who tries so hard to deny how she feels about someone else." He lifted his hands.

"Tom, no, please…" I rushed forward to hold him, I held myself against him, "Listen."

"No Amber!" he pushed me, I felt myself hit the sofa falling onto it, he looked shocked by what he'd done, "We're over, ok." He said quietly, "I can't be with you Amber, because as much as you hate to admit it, I was just someone to use, to get to Tony Stonem, you don't love me, you never was going to love me," he walked out the living room, I hear the front door slam, and I felt my hands going over my face, I felt myself breaking down, I was so screwed.


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: **Ok, so this is a M, don't need to say it, but to say it, ha! Ok, point is that sexual content, and I am pretty sure that this is going to happen, but then writing was just a part that needed to be careful...  
Also thank to Katt for giving me the idea of how to start events...  
It's official, Paramore, The only Exception, is the main song for Amber and Tony...

* * *

**Chapter 15**

Sitting on the sofa, I'd not moved, for the first time in my whole life. I was dumped, someone broke up with me. I was the bad person in all of this; I couldn't cry anymore, the tears had dried on my face leaving me feeling worse than I could even imagine myself feeling. I kept trying to connect the clues, feel anything that I could of missed. But as much as I thought of all the things I loved about Tom, I just couldn't bring myself to love him, he was right in some way. Maybe I wanted to prove something to Tony. I brushed my hands over my face hearing the buzzer; I didn't have a clue who it could have been walking into the hall pressing the button. "Amber,"

"Tony," I felt my hand tighten, "What do you want?" I asked while trying to control my temper.

I listened to the silence; "I need," his voice stopped and I heard vomiting.

"God fucking sake!" I pressed the enter button, "Try not to puke on the stairwell…" I added as I heard the door open, I took my finger off the button feeling my closing eyes, and then taking a deep breath.

Opening the front door I could see the look in Tony's face, he looked a hot mess, I rolled my eyes, "I needed to see you," his voice sounded better, but I could smell the vodka on his breath making my stomach turn. "I just need to use your bathroom first," I pointed to me, and I stepped aside watching him rush to my bathroom.

I'd walked into the living room again, I glanced to the cup of coffee, I loved that no matter how much I drunk, and it wasn't making me edgy, just taking off the edge of guilt I was feeling. I picked my mug up heading to the kitchen, I turned the kettle on trying to control myself, I wasn't going to be yelling, my throat hurt, my hands felt shaky, ok, maybe the coffee was effecting me.

The chain of the toilet echoed through the house, the running tap, then the door opening as I could hear Tony walking towards the kitchen, I'd made him a mug of coffee, I see him looking at me, "You need this," I pushed the coffee in his direction.

"Thanks," Tony picked the coffee up, I couldn't believe he had the nerve to come here, but as much as I wanted to hate him right now, I just didn't have the strength in me to throw him out looking the way he did. "Amber, I am sorry," he said as I walked passed him into the living room.

"Don't want to hear it Tony," I replied sitting on the sofa, I placed my coffee mug down, I could see Tony joining me, he sat on the arm chair, "Seriously, don't want to hear it," I repeated as I lifted the mug, taking a sip of coffee trying my hardest not to look at Tony.

Drinking coffee in silence, I couldn't bring myself to say anything, Tony drank, then placed the empty mug down, "So, you going to see Tom?" he asked me, I could tell the coffee had help sober him up, so I kept looking to the blank TV, "I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry," he carried on.

I felt my eyes watching his reflection on the blank screen, "Sorry, Tony you come here drunk," I kept myself looking to the screen, seeing him move from the arm chair, he sat on the sofa with me, I could see he was looking at me, "Tom broke up with me," I added playing with the mug feeling empty.

Tony placed a hand on my shoulder, "Amber,"

"Tony don't say you're sorry," I felt the mug drop to the carpet, "I am not letting you feel sorry for the mess you fucking made." I felt him getting up as I got to my feet; he went to touch me, as he moved I pushed him down.

I ran to my bedroom, I slammed it behind me, I screamed, I found myself standing in front of my wall of shame, I found every photo I'd printed of Tony, I pulled it from the wall, each time I'd scream, ripping the photos fast, feeling the fragile pieces of history hitting the floor, I kept pulling until I couldn't see his face, part of the wall was blank, all little dots of blue tack that kept the photos in place, I fell to my knees pulling at the photos crying hard, I felt my door slowly open, there was Tony staring at me as I sat on the floor surrounded by all the photos I'd ripped off the wall, all ripped and torn around me.

He moved slowly into the room, he kept looking down to me, "Amber," he looked shocked by the state of the wall, the fact I'd torn my famous wall to nothing, I must of looked like a complete psychopath.

"Three hundred and fourth five photos," I kept my voice light, "I'd started this wall when I was thirteen, it was when I took a picture of Sid puking up cheap cider. I pointed to the corner, "Polaroid, then I started taking more, I got my first camera, then I developed them, and I'd pin not only shameful photos, I'd put any photo I loved, and then I got my digital camera, and printed out photos," I felt my lip shiver as Tony looked to the wall, the photos still there, college days, nights out, and most of the photos left were everyone else but him, I played with the photos I'd ripped up. "Three hundred and forty five photos," I said again looking to the wall, "Of you," I then laughed, "Photos of you and Sid, photos of you with Michelle, photos of Maxxie and me and you, photos of you passed out, photos of you dancing, I took over three hundred photos of you, and I put them up on this wall."

Tony slowly moved to be sitting with me, he glanced down to the one I was holding in my hand, I'd not torn it up, it was old, the photo was one of the oldest of the wall, and it was when I was in the hospital after having my appendices out. Tony took the photo from my hands looking over it. "You couldn't talk, so everyone made fun," he said calmly, "I sat with you, and I said that I'd always be your friend, even if you never talked again," he glanced into my eyes. "I fucked up…" he finished.

I glanced into his eyes, "You didn't fuck up Tony," I took the photo from his hand looking down to the picture of me, and him, we were both only about seven years old, and here we were, grown up, and changed. "I just wished I'd," I got to my feet brushed my hands over my hair; I pulled it out letting it fall messy around my shoulders. "I don't know," I laughed trying to shake the awkwardness of it all.

"I can take it back," Tony got up, he looked serious, "I'll take it back, I never said I love you, it was me being a dick," he nodded, "I'm Tony Fuck anything with a Vag Stonem…" he finished as I stood staring at him.

I moved closer to him, I could look into his blue eyes, see them looking into mine, and I held his arm, my hand touching him, he kept looking at me, "Don't take it back Tony," I felt my voice was smooth, I could feel my heart pounding hard against my chest. "I need to know how long?"

"I don't really know," he touched my arm, he kept watching my eyes, "I just know that I don't know what I'd do if you'd stop talking to me," he smiled lightly, "I never thought I'd ever lose you," he added while I couldn't think.

His smile made me smile, I knew that it was really hard for me to keep being mad, he was Tony. The bad joked, the corny grins, the smart clothes, the guy that was always fun, always there. I felt him tilt his head; I closed my eyes bringing my lips to touch his.

Tony wrapped his arms around me, I could feel him kissing me back, the first time I'd ever kissed Tony, and it wasn't anything thing I thought it would be, but it was better than any kiss I'd ever had. His hands working into my hair as I felt the kiss getting deeper, it made my stomach float, it wasn't heavy anymore, I could feel every nerve in my body coming alive. Breaking apart I watched his eyes, they were studying mine, "Wow…" I whispered while feeling his hand brush my cheek.

Tony broke into a grin, "I," he brushed a hand into my hair again, "You just kissed me," he whispered as I nodded, "Amber," he brushed his hands down my waist; he stopped at my hip as I glanced over his eyes.

I kept smiling, "Tony," I felt strange, I said his name many time, but this was the first time I'd said in this tone. He leaned down kissing me again, I wrapped my arms around the back of his neck feeling his hands moving under my vest, his touch made my skin react, Goosebumps breaking over my skin, I moved my hands to his shirt pulling it over his head. I caught his eyes, kissing again, his hand played over my bra, shifting around the clasp undoing it quickly, breaking the kiss I let him take the vest and bra off together.

I felt his eyes burning on me, he kissed down my neck, he stopped at the base of my throat lightly biting the skin, his hand cupping my boob, my nipple in-between his thumb and index finger rolling it lightly, I gasped holding onto the buckle of his belt, he kept kissing down my collarbone, I felt my heart going crazy, opening the buckle I knew where this was going as I felt my hand work into the front of his boxers. He was hard, I never imagine this even happening, let alone with Tony. I moved my hand slowly up and down his shaft, he moaned into my chest.

Lifting me we moved to the bed, I kept focusing on my breathing, he looked up into my eyes, kissing my lips again, we kiss hard, and I moved my hand, I started to kiss down his chest, feeling his hand move into my jogging bottoms, he moved my knickers to one side running his finger against my folds, I couldn't breath as the feather light touch ran over my clit making me bite onto his nipple lightly, he gasped, pushing his fingers inside as I relaxed, it was sore, but I could help but feel him moving them around, I kissed to his neck again, kissing to his mouth again.

Tony moved my joggers off slowly, I felt my hands pulling his jeans with his boxers, reached over to my clutch bag on the nightstand, and I took out a condom, "Safety first," I looked into his eyes, he took the condom placing it on the bedside smiling.

"I know," he looked over my body, it was the first time I'd had a boy look at me naked, the first time I'd seen someone naked in these circumstances. "I just," he leaned up kissing me, I closed my eyes feeling him holding me close to him, he moved his hand down, he brushed my inner thigh lightly, moved it over my clit again pressing a little harder each time, I gasp in the kiss, he moved watching my eyes, "Are you…" before he could get the word ok out, I pulled him into another kiss, my hand moving down his stomach, I held into him, moving my hand up and down his shaft, I was making it carefully, I reached over to the condom, I felt Tony's eyes studying me, "Sure?" He finished his sentence, and I lightly kissed him.

"Please," I kept watching his eyes, he placed his hand over mine, the condom was in his hand now, he unwrapped it, I felt myself staring at the ceiling, I could see Tony laying on top of me, he tried to keep a calm face.

He moved my hips up, I could feel the tip of him entering me, I held my breath looking away as he pushed slowly at first, the pressure stung, my hands held onto his back, I felt him kissing my neck, "I love you Amber," he whispered into my ear, he pulled out lightly pushing back in, I pulled my knees up to hold onto him tighter. "I want you," he carried on.

I closed my eyes, he held his hands behind my back I finally found his eyes, I could feel him pushing harder each time, I kissed him feeling every push, I knew I was breathing heavy, my hands holding onto him tight, "Tony," I gasped feeling myself tense, I couldn't control it, "ah," I gasped out, my hands pulling him tighter, wanting to feel more of him inside me, I could feel my toes curling as I came, "I love you," I gasped, I felt him kissing my neck again, holding me, I couldn't stop gasping as he finally came, he looked into my eyes, kissing my forehead.

"Amber," he spoke softly looking into my eyes, "I really do," I pressed my finger against his lips as I moved from under him.

"I know Tony," I watched him lay on his back, I placed my head against his chest hearing his heart beating heavy, I knew mine was beating that fast too looking into his eyes. "I love you too." I kissed him one more time feeling him holding me against his chest; I could only just lie there listening to his heartbeat, lying together. "But that was fucking awesome," I laughed finally listening to Tony chuckle.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Thirteen hours in bed, well practically that amount of time in my bed, I felt sore, but it was worth it, I loved the feeling that I was laying beside Tony, I'd glanced out the window seeing the darkness, I curled close to him kissing his bare chest, he kissed my forehead. "I think I have friction burn," I giggled feeling Tony brushed a hand up my back, it was slick from sweat, my eyes focused on his trying to remember we'd been laying in this bed, kissing, having sex, I'd rolled over looking into my nightstand, I found my tin, opening it with the spliff I had, I sat up starting to roll.

"So, where are we going from here?" Tony asked as I licked the skin, rolling the perfect joint, I knew the question would come up, I kept my eyes on Tony's finding my purple lighter.

I lit the spliff up taking the smoke down, I closed my eyes exhaling, "I don't know," I finally answered him, I passed the spliff to him, as he inhaled, and I brushed my hand down his thigh, "I mean, do we tell people that we're together, or keep it to ourselves, wait…" I took the spliff off him inhaling again, "It's not something I thought about Tony," my voice calm.

Tony laughed, "I'd not thought of it either," now brushed his lips against my neck as I closed my eyes carefully flicking ash into a ashtray, I was always surprised to feel his hand brushing over my stomach, "I also know we've run out of condoms," he grinned looking to the wrappers over the floor, my waste bin would have to be hidden from Gina.

"Again Tony, Friction burn!" I placed the spliff between his lips as he inhaled and exhaled with a smirk, "Oh shh, I think I might have to," I pointed to the door getting out the bed, I felt his eyes on me. "Tony, it's not like you've not seen a girl naked before," I picked up my dressing gown.

Tony flicked ash, he smiled, "Yeah, but non of them had been you," he sat up straight looking into my eyes, "you're beautiful Amber," he placed the spliff into his mouth inhaling exhaling making a blush break over my face.

"Oh shh your face," I walked to the bathroom, I closed the door behind me finding my refection, my eyes still looked wide, my chest was covered in little red bumps, I knew it was all the sex, I never imaged having that much in one day, but here I was feeling my hand down my waist feeling my smile wasn't fading, I kept looking down as I took the dressing gown off, I started the shower, I got into the running water feeling it sooth my, I heard the door opening, looking to see Tony getting into the shower with me.

"Leaving me alone," he grinned running his hands down my body, I looked into his eyes, "You don't mind me?" he asked holding me closer to him, I felt him slowly kissing my neck, I broke into a grin, I felt a didn't want this to end.

I woke up in the morning rolling on my side seeing the bed was empty. After blinked away the sleepy feeling I felt around the other side where Tony slept, I felt slight panic before I found the piece of paper folded neatly on the night stand reached over I picked it up feeling scared opening the note.

_I hope you don't have to read this; I needed to get stuff from my place. I've taken your flat key to let myself back in before you can wake up._

_Love you  
Tony…  
_I smiled placing the note back on the nightstand where I found it, I placed my head down on the pillow trying to fall back to sleep, I wanted to pretend that I was still asleep, but I knew I was too excited to see him again.

I listened carefully, I glanced to my bedroom door seeing it opened quietly, then I see a hand, "You know I can see your eyes open…" Tony whispered creeping into the room, and I pulled the blanket over my head. I'd giggled as he sat on the bed; he pulled the blanket down looking into my eyes, "I needed to get new clothes, and my course work," he placed his bag down on my bedroom floor leaning down kissing me.

I kissed back smiling brighter, "Sorry, I didn't," I stopped talking brushing my hand over my face, "I need to get ready for college," I slipped out of the bed looking to Tony watching me, I was wearing a small pair of shorts and a vest, "Are we, going into College together?" I asked feeling nervous.

Tony wiggled his eyebrow, "I think the sooner they know, the better," he glanced over me, "Also, your mum knows," he rushed out the door leaving me standing in my bedroom in complete shock.

After dressing in a pair of skinny jeans and plaid shirt I'd brushed my hair, slowly slipping my black converses on, I walked into the kitchen seeing Tony talking to Gina over breakfast. "Oh, you decide to grace us with your presence," Gina smiled to me, then glanced to Tony, "Your boyfriend got caught sneaking back into the flat," some creepy reason she didn't look pissed off about me having a boy stay the night, but smiled. "I can get you a spare key," she tapped Tony's hand.

"Mum, are you feeling ok?" I asked stepping closer to the kitchen table, I sat down feeling Tony squeezing my knee under the table, "I mean, Tom broke up with me, and now I have Tony here…"

Gina waved her hand, "Oh Amber, I knew that Tom wouldn't last, he was just, weird," she then laughed looking to Tony, "He used to call her Berie, I mean, that was her nickname as a baby," she crinkled her nose up, "Please don't ever call her that around the house…" she glanced to her watch, "Oh, I've got a meeting, you two, I'll see you later," she kissed my forehead walking out the kitchen, she picked up her bag and keys leaving the flat.

"What can I say, mother's love me," Tony picked up a piece of toast biting into it with a grin; I kept looking back to the door.

I felt like laughing, "Well one down," I reached over taking the other piece of toast taking a bite of it, and Tony bit into his piece, "Better get moving, we've got English," I now got to my feet smiling to Tony, "College is going to be pretty interesting," I added picking up my bag, Tony picked his bag up kissing me quickly.

Tony, and me hand in hand, I was walking down the hallway of college, and I was holding hands with Tony, he was holding my hand. I know I have said the hand holding part, but it was still strange to see the eyes of the girls staring at me.

I could see Michelle looking from her locker, her eyes wide, but she didn't seem to be pissed off, she closed her locker after taking her books out, Jal paused in the doorway of the class, she stared to the hand holding. "Morning…" she said slowly.

"Morning," I replied walking into the class, Tony still didn't let go of my hand, Sid stared up from his normal spot, he kept staring as I let Tony's hand go, I went to my table, and I could see Tom in the corner, his eyes glared to me, but as much as it hurt me to hurt him, I knew that I wasn't going to let him get to me as I sat with Maxxie looking from me, then back to Tony.

"Ok, for everyone staring, yes, I spent the whole weekend with Amber, and yeah, I am with her…" he sat down as I rolled my eyes.

Maxxie poked me in the arm, "So that is why I didn't see you this morning…" he whispered as I broke into a smiled, "you didn't," he added.

"Yeah, I did," I now glanced back to see Tony smiling at me, "What can I say, I lost the game, but won as well…" I see Tony blow a kiss to me, and for the first time, I knew it was meant to be this way.  


* * *

**A/N:** I am happy to say that I am happy that this story has reached it end, maybe one day I'll carry on the story, maybe I won't but for now, this is how much I cared about this story, so I am glade to put it to an end...


End file.
